


Her State Of Decay

by Distirb



Category: Homestuck, gamvris - Fandom, vrisgam, zombiestuck - Fandom
Genre: F/M, Multi, Zombie
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-05-02
Updated: 2016-05-29
Packaged: 2018-03-26 17:56:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 33,453
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3859480
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Distirb/pseuds/Distirb
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Zombies have taken over the world, and all that's on Vriska's mind is survival, until she comes across a group of people who just might be what she never knew she was looking for.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Found

**Author's Note:**

> this is my first attempt at anything zombie related, but I've had a zombie marathon and really wanted to try, let me know if i should scrap it or not, it's pretty much a demo.

There have to be other people out here, I've been walking through this god forsaken town for days. All I can do is scavenge for food and try to find evidence of other people. But there's no one here. I was able to fix up a radio and I barely caught the tail end of a broadcast, that's why I finished up my bike as quickly as possible and took off toward Maple Valley, Washington. When I got here I found a few supermarkets, they were just about scavenged of all the good stuff but I was able to grab a few cans of tuna and some water. That was the only sign of life I was able to find. The only weird thing about it was there no dead walking around either. Every town I went through had a horde or two aimlessly walking around, but here, it was completely desolate. I found myself a nice spot to hunker down at night, it wasn't a good idea to be out at night, dead or no dead. 

There are a couple different variations of dead I've encountered. The walkers, totally average 'zombies', they just walked around looking for something to eat. The Screamers, nasty buggers with a nasty habit of screeching, they are usually found near hoards of walkers, when they scream, the walkers come. The bloaters, these are hard to kill and rarely move around, but they have this nasty charge that can knock someone 100 ft backwards. And then there's the animal category, they're not actual animal dead, but for some reason they're different, faster, stronger, and have this wicked animal like pounce that once you're caught, you're done for. I hate each and every one of them, but the Animal dead are the only ones that terrify me. I've been able to kill each category but the animal. I've got it down pat, I've even done if for fun, but my hand shakes whey they arrive. I can't focus and I hunker down until it's gone. The shaking doesn't stop for hours. But I guess that's what happens when you witness your whole family torn apart, limb for limb, by an animal.

I stared down at my bag, I carried a shot gun, sniper rifle, a handgun in my belt, and plenty of ammo. Other than that I have the few cans of tuna and water. Ever since the disease spread, I always placed protection first. I checked my guns, I keep them loaded. I tried to sleep but the silence was worse than hearing the dead shuffle around. I slept for about four hours in total and watched the sun rise. It may have been the longest I slept in a while, but it still wasn't worth shit. I rubbed my eyes and packed my bag. Another day for scavenging and searching for people. I set out really slow, checking my surroundings for dead, but I quickly picked up the pace and set off toward the other end of town. I walked for a while, sipping at my water. This place was so much like a ghost town it drove me crazy. Nothing to kill, nothing to scavenge. Seriously, nothing. 

At about noon I found myself in a suburb, and finally found myself some walkers to kill time with. I grabbed a lead pipe off the ground and snuck up behind one of them, a quick whack to the temple put him out for the count, and he didn't even see it coming. The other turned around at the sound and came at me, I swiped the pipe up at it's jaw and watched him fall backwards. I placed my foot on his chest and slammed the pipe into his head. I smirked, it was so easy to kill these, I might just make it a sport. I could never keep track though. I adjusted my tank top and pulled up my shorts, the only bad thing about killing these fuckers is all the blood. I only carry a couple pairs of undies and feminine products, anything else comes from department stores as I go through towns.

I was lost in thought and didn't hear the shuffling behind me, only until the high pitch scream rang through my ears did I realize the walkers were about a block away, a horde of about 10 and a screamer. I covered my ears to block out the scream. It stood only a few feet from me. I pulled out the gun from my pocket and fired at its head. the screaming stopped, but I had a bigger problem on my hands. The horde had quickened its pace and was almost in a full sprint in my direction. I took off in the opposite direction, stopping only at corners to take one or two out. I was starting to wear out and there were at least five left. Of course it didn't help that the sun was just beaming down on me. I was running out of ammo in my hand gun, but I wasn't at a point where I could pull out my shotgun. They were gaining on me and I wasn't getting any faster.

I rounded another corner and fired again behind me. Three left, I might be able to take them on if I could isolate them. Fuck. I'm fucked. I'm out of ammo and my shotgun's stuck in my bag. I figured it was now or never. I swung the backpack around in front of me and tried pulling at the shotgun, it was hooked on something inside the bad and wasn't coming loose. I peeked back for a second, but that was a bad choice. Like a complete idiot, I tripped over my own feet. My elbow hit the ground, hard, and I rolled off my bag and onto my back, waiting. I can't believe I'm such an idiot, I'm going to die here and I haven't even seen any living people since I watched my family die. Speaking of witch, I should be dead already. I sat up and watched 4 people, yes people, kill the third walker. 

I stared at them blankly, they were the most mix matched group I've ever seen. A dork, a hipster, a pink goth, and a dog chick? I don't know what the hell I was seeing, but if I hadn't killed a hundred or so of these creatures I would have burst out laughing by now, but my eye caught movement from behind a car, only the quick movement of something that hunts. Nothing other than an animal. I yanked at the barrel of the shotgun, it came out a little easier but I still had to give it quite a tug. I pulled it out and got my finger on the trigger right as it jumped out from behind the car. Of course I didn't have enough time to get it properly situated in the nook of my shoulder. I'm going to regret this later. I fired, the recoil sent the gun flying off to the side, taking my arm with it. I fell to the ground, I'm almost positive my shoulder was ripped out of socket. My eyes darkened and my head spun, Oh god I hope I killed it. 

"Hey, hey, are you ok?" I felt a cool hand on my other shoulder, "You got it, thank you." I blinked and my eyes started tearing up. "No, no, it's ok. Let me help you up."

"That was my first." I let her wrap my arm around her shoulders and pull me up off the ground.

"First?" She spoke directly in my ear, she had a small lisp and a perky voice. 

"First animal."

"Oh. Can you walk?" I nodded. I looked up, the sky was so bright, unbearably so. Ugh. 

"I'm Jade, This," She pointed to the dork who I realized looked a lot like her, "is John," Then to the hipster in a hello kitty shirt, "Dave," and finally to a girl about my height wearing a god awful pink scarf in this heat "and Rose." 

"Vriska." I grabbed the shotgun off the ground and tucked it in my bag. It seemed to have been stuck on a can of tuna and one of my favorite pair of undies, which are now torn. "Damn."

"Are you ok?" Rose spoke to me, but stared at my shoulder. "That was quite a shot, we didn't even notice that thing. You called it an animal?" I nodded. "I guess that's not far off from what we call it, a Rabid zombie."

"They're all rabid, maybe it should just be called a hunter." I chuckled, it was so nice to talk to actual people, no matter how weird the group looked, holding tools and cookery.

"We should get back. The shots may have attracted more." Dave brought me back to the current situation, I couldn't tell if he was sweating under those shades of his, but he had to be in those jeans. 

"You're right," Rose turned her attention to the street behind us. 

Jade hopped froward a few steps and turned her head back to me, "Coming?" She smiled and motioned her head towards the rest of the group. 

"Sure, that's why I'm here."

\--------

After a short walk we reached an area about the size of a block, completely fenced off with wood boards and chain link. there were a couple of makeshift towers for patrol and chairs and umbrellas on the roof. Interesting setup, efficient and roomy. There were four houses, in the fenced area. The windows are all boarded up, for extra protection I assume. I followed the group through a gate and realized just how great the setup was. They had crops growing all around, there's a first aid station and what looks like a radio station and weapons. They even started on a brick wall that extended through the back fencing area. 

"Wow, you guys have a great setup."

"Not bad, right? Most of us here are under 20, but we've had some great ideas. Plus we're a lot more fit than most adults anyway." Jade skipped next to me, she was quite a bit shorter than me but sometimes that's an advantage. "Lets introduce you to some of the people." She pointed over to the radio station, "Equius set that up, he was almost always there until we found a few tapes he could record and just send out the same message on all frequencies, he's really smart when it comes to tech stuff, which kinda sucks for him because we only have one generator." Then she pointed over to the med station, "We generally switch roles at the med station, there's a doctor from the local hospital, Dr. Greg, who spends most of his time there, but we haven't had to scavenge much lately so he's been taking it easy and taking care of the crops while I'm away. I mostly deal with the crops, since I got them all going, but everyone pitches in." She smiled at me. "Mostly everyone is inside, Except Dirk, Roxy and Jake. they're manning the look out towers, which was their idea to begin with. Jake taught most of us how to shoot. He's really good. You won't really see much of them except in dire situations. They're all about the same age, and Jane too, she does most of the cooking, which is really quite a bit considering the amount of people we have here. I think there's 14 of us now." She started counting off, mumbling names here and there. I noticed John jogging over to us and bumped he with my elbow. "Oh! John!" she waved to him and he gave a quick wave back.

"Jane told me to tell you that instead of rambling on about the crops, you should let Vriska get something to eat and look around herself. And she needs more cucumbers for the salad." He was a little out of breath, but got everything out in one breath. 

"Oh! I am so sorry! Yes, ok, I'll leave you be then." Jade trudged her way over to the garden and started assessing cucumbers. 

"You should probably get your shoulder checked out, Dr. Greg should be down soon." He pointed over to the medic station. 

"Thanks, John." I smiled at him and his cheeks flushed a little.

"Uhh! Let me take your bag! We have a few empty cots in the third house. Do you prefer privacy? I could put you up in Roxy's room, she's hardly there anyway."

"Sure, that's fine." I handed him my bag and he jogged off. 

"Is there some kind of no walk policy around here or something?" I muttered to myself. 

"That was Jake's idea." I was startled and whipped around, holding my shoulder in place. "He said it keeps you on your toes for a surprise attack. Only the younger ones follow that advice though. Oh, and the idiot himself." I was being talked to through a odd pair of shades that had an obnoxious point on the outer rims. 

"And you are?" 

"Dirk."

"Vriska."

"Welcome, Vriska." He walked off in the direction of the first house, Dave seemed to be waiting for him and they walked inside together. They both had samurai swords on their backs.

"Weird." I rolled my eyes and made my way over to the medic tent.

\--------

The doctor was nice, but the pain wasn't. He had to pop my arm back into place. He said he could give me some anesthetic, but I figured it'd feel the same as cracking my joints, so I told him not to waist it. But oh god did it hurt. I swear I need to kill something right about now. I wiped the sweat from my forehead and took a few pain killers, thank god they seemed stocked up on those. I might be back for another round soon. 

I wandered around for a little, checking out the crops and weapons. I refilled my handgun and stuck it back in my belt. Never too safe. I decided it would be a good idea to check out my room, it was easy to find, and like John said, my roommate wasn't there. I changed my tank top, since it was splattered in blood, and checked my equipment. Everything seemed ok, I should probably put mine with the others, but I know these guns inside and out, they were mine. 

"You good at sniping?" A tall figure stood at my door, carrying a margarita glass.

"I get by." She must be Roxy. 

"Wanna come to the tower? I could use a quick break."

"Aren't you on break now?" I glanced at her glass

"Technically, no." She smirked at me and spun on her too high heels and walked off. I grabbed my rifle and extra ammo and followed her. 

"Why is the town area so clear? I mean cars and litter are everywhere, but I didn't see any dead when I was there."

"Because we draw too much attention here, sure it's not too safe, but three sniper towers are protection enough. Not a single zombie has broken through. But you can never be too safe, especially with all these teens running around." 

"That's why you're building a wall."

"Yeeep!" She downed the rest of her drink before we left the house. "Oh and one thing. We permit handguns in the house, but we prefer no heavy weapons past the hallway." She opened the hall closet to reveal racks and racks of guns. She grabbed the first sniper rifle and closed the door. We walked over to the closest tower and climbed the ladder. I don't know how she did it in those heels of her, but she didn't even slip. 

"Why do the glasses twins have samurai swords? I can understand the benefit of a clean slice, but doesn't Dirk stay in the tower most of the time?"

"Jade hasn't explained that yet?" She threw her head back and laughed, "They think they're ninjas, and I'm being totally serious, ninjas!" She laughed again. I couldn't help but chuckle with her, I figured this place was going to be strange considering the welcoming party I got, but damn.

"Do you want me to spot?" I glanced at the scope.

"Nope, you shoot, I want to see what you're made of." I was so glad she said that, I needed to kill something and this seemed the best way to to it, considering my shoulder is still throbbing. 

"To the left near the blue car." Down. "Up the street a little, there's a bloater." Down with a nice acid explosion. "Get the three walkers behind it." Down. Down. Down. Not that I'm bragging or anything but I had plenty of practice when I was passing through California. "Well, good job newbie. But Dirk'll be up my ass if you clear them out before he can get some. The rest are walkers and the scouting party has a clear path. They should be back in about an hour."

I didn't appreciate being called a newbie, but at least I wasn't categorized as a teen. Technically when you're 20 you're not a teen anyway. We climbed down the ladder and made our way toward the delicious smell of food. I haven't had a home cooked meal in forever. Not that I generally did before the spread, but what can I say.

I grabbed a plate of food, it was set up buffet style, and found a quiet place to sit, but before I knew it I was surrounded by my rescuers. Jade plopped down next to me and started chatting about the rules, Rose followed her but pulled out a book instead of trying make small talk, John and Dave sat adjacent to me, John smiled and Dave just nodded, rude. I barely listened to what Jade was going on about, I was enjoying my food too much. Even the throbbing in my arm stopped, pain killers barely work without food anyway. It felt nice and warm, being surrounded by other people. I had definitely gotten used to being alone, but I could easily fall into the company of this group. 

"Helloooooo, Vris, are you listening? The other scavenging party should be back soon, wanna pave the way with us?" She was beaming from ear to ear. 

"Why not, I could kill some more Z's" I stood up slowly and rotated my arm, not much trouble there, I should be completely fine by tomorrow. Following the group out the front door I grabbed a shotgun, but Jade stopped me. 

"We don't like to bring the guns, you can choose anything else, but our mission is usually to be quiet and not draw attention to ourselves." I never saw Jade so serious, even though I just met her recently.

"You mean we're supposed to be like ninjas," I glanced in Dave's direction, I think I saw an eyebrow twitch, but those stupid shades block everything. I grabbed a hunting knife off one of the lower racks, it should suffice. I was definitely more comfortable with a gun. 

We walked out, lookouts positioned in the towers, I looked back and Roxy waved down to me. I watched her sip at her drink, It wasn't totally reassuring, but I'm sure she's great with a gun. We walked a couple blocks, no dead around yet. I was hoping it stayed that way, my shoulder was starting to hurt again. 

"Ten more minutes, they should be rounding that corner." Rose spoke low, we decided it was best to lay low, using the cars for cover. 

"How many are there?" I matched her tone.

"Three. Kanaya, Tavros and Gamzee." That's odd, I figured four was a safer number. 

"Why only three?"

"Not enough man power back at home if there's two teams of four." Makes sense. I was about to ask another question when I heard the stomping of feet. A car came tumbling out from around the corner.

"Oh fuck." 

"Get down!" Dave yelled from across the street, they had ducked into the ally. 

Of course I didn't listen, fucking bloater caught sight of me as he rounded the corner. I could tell he was working up another charge, I had to do something quick, or else we'd be overwhelmed by walkers soon. I grabbed Rose's wrist and sprinted across the street, pushing her into John, "Stay together!" and with that I took off down the street. After eating a good mean I felt more energized than I had been in a while. The stomping came quick, but bloaters were only good for a few feet, they weren't meant for long distance. But he was able to pick up a car, again, with his charge and it landed to the right of me. Fuck that was close. I ducked behind a car and un-tucked my gun from my belt and knife from my boot. This fucker's going down. I peeked out from behind the car, The bloater was slightly disoriented and looking around. It didn't notice me behind the car, or Dave who had snuck up behind him, sword drawn. We locked eyes, or at least I think we did because he gave me a quick nod. 

"What the fuck does that mean?" I whispered to myself. Was that a 'stay there I got this nod' or a 'distract him while I slice his head off with my glorified butter knife' nod? Oh well, I don't care what he's planning, I'll do my thing and he can do his. I concentrated on aiming my gun at the bloater's temple, it's hard to kill one with just a hand gun, but a good shot in the sweet spot will do the trick. i started to squeeze the trigger when Dave, unexpectedly jumped off the roof of a car and stabbed his knife into the bloaters back. Great. Fucking. Job. Dave. The bloater immediately turned around and I no longer had a good shot at his head. Fuck. 

Now I'm not really good at last minute ideas, but I had a really stupid one, that just might work. While the bloater was getting ready up for a charge at Dave who had bolted into a small ally, I ran up behind him and grabbed a hold of the sword and pulled myself onto its back. Now, I only have a few seconds after I kill this bastard to find cover, so I have to act quick. I quickly plunged my hunting knife into the fuckers temple and jumped to the ground. Unfortunately for me, this one was an oddity and immediately exploded. I was able to shield my face in time, but a mist of acid sprayed all over the left side of my body. Fuck. 

I think I'm pretty good with pain, generally speaking, I didn't scream when Dr. Greg popped my arm back in socket, I didn't scream when I dislocated my shoulder in the first place either. But right now, I'm feeling a whole new kind of pain. The kind of pain I wished someone would just put a bullet in my brain so I can finally stop screaming. I'm sure it was a god awful, heart wrenching kind of scream, the kind that comes from deep within your lungs, the kind you never know you're capable of until you let it all out. Well, this was definitely that kind of screaming, and I could not stop. 

Thankfully I passed out after a matter of seconds. I can't remember anything that happened, I don't remember being picked up by a man I do not know, or being rushed to the medical tent and treated for hours on end for four days straight, I don't even remember waking up the few time I did only to scream again. No, I just remember waking up this morning feeling almost euphoric, no pain, no screaming, just this happy bubbly feeling in my stomach. But that all went away after I puked my guts out. I spent the rest of that day in bed, I tried to get up a few times, but Dr. Greg wouldn't let me move. He looked exhausted. 

"You should get some rest, I feel fine." 

"Of course you would, you finally ate something solid." Dr. Greg removed his reading glasses and rubbed his eyes. 

"I'm seriously fine," I sat up and glared at him, just to make a point, it actually hurt a lot to do that. 

"Okay, okay, I'll be back in a few hours to check on you, don't go anywhere."

"Yea, okay." He walked out of the tent and I sat still and waited. No way was I going to just sit around, I needed movement. With a small groan I pushed myself off the cot. The bandages covering my arm, waist, and leg were a little stiff but after a I bent my joints a little they felt better. I pulled on a pair of shorts, with only a little pain, and slipped into a large t-shirt. I looked like a fricken mummy. 

I peeked out from around the curtain of the tent, it was after dusk and unless you were on tower duty, you were inside. Good. I snuck over to the tower Roxy claimed and made my way slowly up the ladder. I peeked up to see if she was there, and to my luck, she was. I pulled my body onto the wood and slowly stood up. One of the bandages around my arm came loose revealing a nasty burn. I tightened it quickly. That won't be pretty.

"Hey." I sat down next to Roxy on the spotter stool. 

"Heyy! How goes it?" 

"Constant bed rest, I'm going to get fat." She chuckled, "You would think I could move for more reasons than to pee."

"So true! Dr. Greg can be a hard ass, but it's seriously a miracle you're alive, you got hit with acid pretty bad. He really tries hard to keep everyone alive."

"Well, I'm alive, so give me a break." I rolled my eyes.

"Don't be mad at Dave, ok?" Roxy's tone was serious, I wasn't expecting it.

"What?"

 

"Don't be mad at Dave, he meant well, and was only trying to help. He's beaten himself up over it enough already."

"Whatever. I won't kick his ass or anything, but I seriously don't want to see his face right now."

"I see." Roxy swirled the drink in her hand, I wonder how much she drinks, seriously, I've never seen her without a drink. 

"Well, places to go, things to see," I stood up, "See ya, Roxy." She didn't reply but I left anyway. I walked around the edge of the fence for a while, checking out the progress of the wall. I heard someone talking about needing more bricks, but it seemed a lot further along than when I got here. Looks like they want to make it a little higher too. I stopped about mid way across the back fence and stared at the stars. They were so pretty, considering there was no power, anywhere, it was so bright out, I never realized how many stars you could see with the human eye.


	2. Chapter 2

I sat down slowly, trying not to undo the bandages. The stone wall behind me was cool against my burning skin, it felt nice. For the first time since the outbreak, I was able to sit back and relax. I always slept with one eye open, the slightest noise would wake me. But right here and now, I felt safe, I could think about everything I had pushed to the back of my mind. Air conditioning was one of them, hot showers, cell phones, wifi, a warm bed and a long enough charger so I could talk to my boyfriend until we fell asleep. I lost everything. I thought of my family, how proud my father would be that I've made it this far. How horrified my mother would be about my new burn. And my brother, he would love Dr. Greg, he was in his 6th year of med school, and very ambitious. All I did since I graduated was work as a bartender, spend all my money before I realized, and sleep my life away. I would have done more, if I knew this was my life now. 

"...iska?" A hand waved in front of my face and I snapped my head back, thumping it against the brick.

"What?" I snapped, and rubbed the back of my head. I glanced over to find a Mousey kid shrink back slightly, I guess I could have toned it down a little.

"Uhhh, Vriska?" He looked at me cautiously.

"Yah, What?" I softened my tone and he relaxed a little.

"Hi! I'm, uhh, Tavros. We haven't really met, uh, yet." He held his hand out to shake mine, but I grabbed it and pulled myself up instead, he had a steady stance, I was half expecting him to fall over.

"Well, you already know I'm Vriska, so, nice to meet you."

"What are you doing out here?" 

"I just needed some air, the first aid tent is stuffy." I smiled at him, and he returned the gesture. 

"Would you like to come meet the rest of the team? They know who you are already, but I just thought you would like to know who they are."

"Why the fuck not? I don't have anything else to do." Tavros led me to the house in the middle, we entered from the back and took the stairs up to the third story/attic space. He rambled about his team, and how long they were together, but I barely listened because the friction of my bandages was starting to hurt. When we entered the attic, it was pretty empty, aside for a couch and a three beds. Tavros motioned for the couch and asked if I wanted anything to drink. 

"Water." He grabbed a bottle from next to the shelf and handed it to me. 

"How old are you?" He stared at me and I took a second to sip my water before answering.

"20ish" I shrugged my shoulders. I didn't keep track of the date, so I wasn't sure if my birthday passed or not. 

"Today's September 24th, it's Thursday."

"That means I'm still 20, I don't turn 21 until November."

"I turned 22 in May, that makes me older than you," I was very surprised, he looked 18 at the most, he seemed to find my surprise funny and laughed, "I know I don't look it, but I really am."

"I'll try to believe you, but it'll take a while to believe it," I smiled at him. He looked like he was going to say something, but someone else interrupted.

"Oh My God! You should NOT be out of bed!" A girl only slightly taller than me rushed over to me and grabbed my elbow. She started pulling me toward another person who just reached the top of the stairs, male, and tall as HELL.

"Dr. Greg is going to lose it when he finds out you're not in bed! Do you have any idea how delicate your skin is now! Your burns won't heal nicely if you move around too much, and you'll be stuck with such a nasty scar."

I dug my heels into the ground and stopped her in her tracks, "I don't care if they scar, I'm not going back to that tent." She spun around, completely aghast by what I said. 

"What? But you have such pretty skin! don't you care about getting better?"

I pulled my arm out of her grip and rubbed it, "It's not like I have time to care, I don't know when I'll have to move again."

"Move? Why would you want go anywhere, you're safe here, and we take care of each other."

"I mean I'll try to pay you guys back, but I can't stay here, I don't belong here."

Tavros quickly interrupted, "Uhh, calm down, please."

"I'm calm," I glanced at him, he looked worried.

"I can't believe this," Kanaya put her hands on her hips and pursed he lips. "She needs to be in bed."

"I'm fine, and I refuse to lay in that bed a second longer."

"Fine? You think you're fine?! Have you even looked at your burns? I looks like something straight from a horror movie."

"That's reassuring," I rolled my eyes at her. I tried not to think about what was under all my bandages, but I figured it was bad.

"We saw everything that happened! How quickly that zombie exploded, we were there for everything that happened after, we," she motioned to Tavros and the guy still standing by the stairs, who looked slightly amused, "got you back here and held you down while you kicked and screamed in pain, you can't tell me you're fine after only five days of recuperation!"

"Yes, I can, and yes I am." My face was burning red from embarrassment. "I'm standing here, aren't I? I'm the one with the HORRIFIC burns on my body."

She huffed and threw her hands into the air. "Fine, have it your way, but Dr. Greg need to know you're out of bed." She stalked out of the room. Great, I'll probably have to go back soon, and I barely got to stretch my legs.

I looked over at Tavros and motioned to the door, "Who was the frantic nurse?"

\--------

Tavros informed me that I was just arguing with the apprentice Doctor, Kanaya, and then introduced me to Gamzee, who still looked amused. To me, he seemed to have a few loose screws, but who am I to judge? Kanaya returned shortly, looking frustrated. 

"He's asleep, isn't he?" She nodded, "He sure looked tired when I sent him to bed."

"I didn't want to wake him," she ran her fingers through her short hair, "But you have to be back before he gets up!"

"Sure, sure, I'll return willingly if I can at least relax." Tavros set me up pretty comfortable in his bed and he took over the couch. 

"You should be relaxing in the medical tent."

"That is far from relaxing, it's stuffy and boring and that is no way to relax," I rolled my eyes, "Anyway, I'll get fat if I lay around any longer, I need to move and kill things."

"You shouldn't be killing things in the middle of the night," She squeezed in next to Tavros on the couch and patted his back reassuringly, she probably knew Tavros thought he would get in trouble for encouraging my defiance. "They're abnormally active."

"No kidding, that was my first mistake," I pulled my sleeve off my right shoulder and turned so she could see a thick scar that started at top of my shoulder and worked its way half way down the back of my arm. "When I first got a hold of a gun, I shot a walker and in no time I was completely surrounded by about 20 more, it was crazy! I literally dove through a glass window to get away and barricaded myself in a freaking broom closet until morning." I laughed at myself, "A piece of glass had lodged itself in my shoulder and it was a bitch to get out." 

"You're pretty lucky not to have died from the size of the scar, it must have been a pretty big piece of glass," Kanaya studied it, she slightly resembled my brother, when he was studying, and intent, and steady gaze. 

"The only reason it's so big is because I could barely reach it and ended up making the cut bigger, I only have my brother to thank for being alive," I rolled my sleeve back down, "If he hadn't stitched up most of my injuries when we were younger, I probably would have belld out." I really wanted to get away from any talk about my brother so I asked the group, "What about you guys? Have any battle wounds?" They all shook their heads, "Wow, Really?" 

"Most of us lived in the area, it's not a very large community." Tavros smiled, "Most of us went to high school together, the rest heard our broadcast and found their way here."

"That was a smart idea, though I never thought to pick up a radio." 

"How did you come across here then?" Gamzee finally joined our conversation, he had been digging through his backs for a while and finally sat down with a bottle of Faygo, seriously?Who drinks that stuff?

"I just avoided big towns and main roads, I had a census and a map in my bag. I figured I would have pretty smooth traveling."

"Are you looking for something?" Gamzee asked while tilting his head to the side.

"I have nothing to look for," I shifted slightly, the bandages were loosening and it's starting to hurt. "Anyway," I avoided their eyes, "I better get back." I paused for a second, "Oh, and Kanaya, Thank you. For, um, being worried." I stood up and scratched the back of my head, "I haven't been around anyone for a while, so I, uh, may have forgotten my manners." I smiled sheepishly.

Kanaya stood also and walked over to me, "I understand, it couldn't have been easy." She reached for my hand but I pulled it away, after a confusing glance she put her hand against my forehead, "Are you okay? You're burning up!"

"I'm fine," I sat back down, I was suddenly feeling dizzy and I could feel my skin heating up, "I just need a second."

"You've been sitting this whole time," she pulled her cardigan sleeve over her palm and started wiping the sweat off my forehead, by now Gamzee was standing behind her, completely towering over both of us, and Tavros stood awkwardly next to the bed. "We need to get you back down to the medical tent." 

"I know," I snapped at her and pushed her hand away, "I'm going," I pushed myself off Tavros' bed and, almost immediately, pain spread throughout the left side of my body. I stumbled slightly, but Kanaya pushed herself under my right arm to hold me up. 

"Gamzee, we need to get her to the tent, quick," Kanaya now supported most of my weight, but Gamzee quickly relieved her and lifted me up in his arms, ugh, princess style.

"I'm fine, I can walk," I pushed against his surprisingly solid chest, I figured he was a little pudgy under the baggy clothes he wore, but I could feel his biceps on the back of my knee, and the solid grip he had across my back. Even with Tavros, there was an odd sense of muscle on him too. It seemed so out of place, but with the environment we lived in, muscles were required. 

"So if I drop you, you could make it all the way back to the med tent by yourself?" He smirked devilishly at me, but all I can do is pout in return.

"Whatever, get this over with quick then." I looked away, a man I barely knew was carrying me princess style. Ugh.

As soon as we were outside a familiar figure came into sight. "Hey, what's going on!" Jade's voice interrupted my self loathing.

"Hey Jade! Living the dream!" I waved to her, but the pain in my stomach twisted my smile and my brows knitted. Jad ran up to Kanaya who was leading us.

"Is she ok? Isn't she supposed to be in bed?" Kanaya glanced at her and then me, and nodded.

"We've got another rebel in our sanctuary who refuses to recuperate properly." Jade stared at me.

"I'm fine Jade, go to bed." She was dressed in a nightgown even my grandmother would't wear, it made me laugh a little, "Seriously, grandma, I love the outfit." I gave her a slight wave, but she just stood still, staring. 

When we finally got back to the tent, the pain has consumed all my thoughts and I sweating so much. I could bite my own tongue off and not feel a damn thing right now, other than this pain. I hadn't realized where Tavros ran off to until he walked into the tent, Dr. Greg in tow. I was laying on the cot digging my nails into the sides. He shook his head at me and filled a syringe with some clear liquid and stuck it into my shoulder. Within minutes the pain started to subside and I was feeling much better. 

"When can I take these bandages off?" I look at Dr. Greg, tears in my eyes. 

"Just a couple more days and it should be healed enough to let them air out." He patted my head and sat down next to me. "I told you not to get out of the cot, Vriska."

"I know," I closed my eyes, "I just hate being confined to a bed."

"Why is that?" He started wiping the sweat off my forehead with a cool towel. 

"I'm no help when I'm stuck here, I want to help." 

"Okay, tomorrow I'll see what you can help with," He stood up, "Maybe we can put you in the garden."

"Anything as long as I'm not stuck here," my voice sounded as sleepy as I felt, I was only out of bed for a couple of hours but I was extremely tired. Must be the pain killers. If there was anything else said, I didn't hear it because I drifted right off to sleep. 

\--------

I woke up the next morning feeling pretty good, I sat up and stretched my arms and legs, the bandages were new, but had a different feel to them. I could move around a lot better. I walked out of the tent to be greeted by the sun bearing down on my face and shoulders. I had on a loose tank top and the same pair of shorts from yesterday. 

"Hey Vriska! Ready to help out?" Jade swooped up next to me and grabbed my non bandaged arm. 

"Huh?" Last night was a little fuzzy, I couldn't remember much of it.

"Dr. Greg said you could help out in the garden today, to get you up and moving!" She beamed a smile at me brighter than the sun.

"Oh, ok, sure." I let her lead me over to the crops, she started explaining what I needed to do to check the crops and how to tell which ones were ripe. She handed me a basket and I set to work, it was pretty simple. It felt good to stretch my legs, maybe later I could ask Roxy to let me shoot something.

"Rose! Dave!" Jade shouted toward two figures a few feet away, "Can you bring the watering cans?" I watched them pick up a couple heavy duty watering cans and bring them this way. My eyebrows started to knit together I was actually having a pretty good time. I turned back to the tomatoes I was analyzing, hoping they'd leave after dropping off the cans. 

"Hey." I was temporarily shaded from the sun by an unwelcome shadow. 

"What?" I definitely meant to sound mean, but that one word held a lot of my hostility. 

"How's," Dave paused, "How's the burns?" I stood up and stared straight into his glasses.

"Fabulous."

"Listen, I'm sorry."

"Sorry for what? Getting in my way? For not listening to me when I told you guys to stay together? For ruining a perfectly good shot with your stupid 'Ninja Sword'? For being the main reason I'm here picking tomatoes instead of being able to kill something? What are you sorry for, Dave?" He had taken a few steps back, and I filled that space. He was not getting off with just saying sorry. Not if I had any say in it.

"Sorry for putting you in this situation. But I had a plan too, a perfectly good one that didn't involve you."

"So you completely disregarded whatever I was doing, and decided you had a better plan. How the hell was I supposed to know?" I grabbed the front of his shirt and pulled his face down to mine. "Was I supposed to know not to step in with that stupid nod? I met you all of four hours before and I was supposed to know what you mean when you nod at me!" I pushed him back hoping to make him stumble and fall, but that kid has good reflexes and barely stumbled. Ugh that makes me even more mad. 

"I apologized! What more do you want?" His voice was full of anger, but his face was pretty much blank, except the corner of his lip, which was turned down. 

"I would really like to kick your ass right about now, but I told Roxy I wouldn't." I balled my fists up, god I want to hit those glasses right off his face.

A smug look crossed as much of his face as I could see, and he crossed his arms, "As if you could in your best condition."

That. Was. It. I threw a round house kick at his torso, which he side stepped. A jab to to face, which he pushed aside. A spinning hook kick with my bandaged leg, that he didn't quite expect, but still move just barely out of the way. I watched his glasses fall to the ground, a nice crack in the lens. He stared down at them also, I took advantage of his distraction and thrust my fist as hard as I could into his stomach. The satisfaction I got when it connected was absolute bliss. Before I could throw another punch I was completely lifted off the ground and over someones shoulder. 

"Let Go Of Me! Put Me Down!" I continued to protest, bet the only response I got was being turned around and carried in the opposite direction, I watched Jade help Dave off the ground, and he retreived his shades and quickly put them back on. At least the smug look was off his fucking face. He glanced in my direction and I couldn't help but give him the finger.

"Gamzee, that's unnecessary! You're going to hurt her, she's still injured," Kanaya trotted up to us and protested, "even though she doesn't act like it."

"Yeah! I'm injured," I squirmed on his shoulder, though I didn't feel any pain, but that could be the adrenaline. 

"Fine, down you go!" I was easily lifted off his shoulder and practically dropped. I took a couple steps back to try to catch myself but I fell on my ass anyway. I glared up at Gamzee, who looked quite amused. 

"Are you okay?" Kanaya knelt beside me examining my bandages. She looked at Gamzee, "that was excessive."

"You said put her down, you didn't say how," he shrugged.

"You're reckless,"Kanaya turned her attention to me, "Dr. Greg allowed you to have some freedom, but you completely took advantage of that and got yourself into a fight, was that really necessary?"

"Completely," Kayana frowned at me, "What? He,"I pointed to Gamzee, "thinks it's amusing." For the first time since I met him, he had a toothy grin across his face. I noticed his cuspids were slightly pointed, and he pulled it off, a little too well. But that's probably the adrenaline speaking. 

"Don't encourage her," Kanaya chided him, but the smile never left his face. I wonder if he ever gets upset. "Seriously though, are you ok?"

"I'm fine, I'm fine, it was nice to stretch my muscles out a bit. I needed that," Kanaya huffed, Gamzee doesn't need to get upset, Kanaya does it for him. 

"The more you move, the longer you have to keep the bandages on."

"Ugh!"


	3. Do you know that I hate Aloe?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If only the Zombie Apocalypse could happen when technology was great enough to instantly heal everything. Things would be so much easier.

I wound my arm in loose circles. Finally without bandages I was feeling complete movement in my limbs. Sure the burns aren't very attractive, and Kanaya's "Aloe Treatments" are ridiculous, but I can freaking move again!

After a week of begging and pouting, Dr. Greg finally granted permission for me to spar. It's been way too long, and I'm sure I'm in need of a good workout. Another plus, Kanaya, Tavros and Gamzee are out on a rations run and I don't have to worry about Kanaya's insistent nagging. Sure I've grown to love her, but I can NOT sit on my ass and be treated for the rest of my life. I live for action!

Starting with a couple laps around the inside perimeter, I could feel all my knots from lying on my back work themselves out. It was a good feeling and I savored the sun. At the end of my third lap, I could see someone flagging me down. I sprinted toward the pink dot. Roxy smiled as I approached, she had an all to bright pink shirt and khakis on, I definitely commend her for pulling of the pink. 

"Want to cover my tower while I grab some breakfast?" She gestured to the rifle strapped to her shoulder. 

"Hell yes!" She pulled the strap over her head and handed it over. 

She gave me a once over and I suddenly felt self conscious about the baggy sweats and half shirt I found in the bottom of Kanaya's clothes chest. Roxy always had a way of looking poised, she'd probably look like the Queen of England in my outfit, whereas I looked like a potato sack that caught on fire. 

"Looking good," She winked at me and brushed her hair over her shoulder, "You'll be doing runs in no time." 

"I can only hope, this is a great space, but I'm not used to being in one place at a time," I wiped the sweat forming on my brow, "Plus, I have to repay you guys before I can head out."

Her eyebrow twitched, I've heard the speech before, plenty of times. I can't stay, I appreciate them, but I just... can't.

"I only need about 30 minutes, Have fun!" and with a wave she was off. 

\--------

Lounging in the tower was a pretty good way to relax after a good jog, low stress but I could still move around. I stretched out the remaining kinks and kept an eye out for movement. Today was especially dead, but not zombie dead, just empty. Nothing to shoot, and after about 15 minutes I was completely bored. I watched the gates open and Dirk and John stroll out. The rations run should be over soon and I'd have to let Kanaya apply Aloe to my back. It was the only place I couldn't reach, plus she threatened to apply it all over when I told her I didn't want aloe. I have enough dignity to apply it to my own parts. I've tried to avoid mirrors, but a glimpse here and there revealed only a few burns on my face, I'm surprised my eye still worked, considering half the skin around my eye was scar tissue. It was healing nicely and wasn't red anymore, but I would never really have the smooth skin I had before. I rubbed my hand along the collar of my shirt, there was a slight scarring on the left side my neck that peaked out of the collar but it only got worse from there. From my left shoulder down to my left knee, I'm all scar tissue. It had an uneven line that traveled down my stomach, almost reaching my bellybutton. I guess the way I fell when the acid hit me, my "lady parts" were spared from the acid, instead my leg took all the damage. I can see why I got lucky in that aspect, but it's not like I was having sex any time soon. 

I brought my mind back to the present, apparently I was so deep in thought I completely missed everyone returning, they were latching the gate and Roxy was making her way up the ladder, cocktail in hand. I don't know how she does that in those heels. 

"How's the area?" She handed me her drink while she climbed into the tower, I took a quick whiff, seriously strong. 

"Deader than the zombies we're looking out for." I handed her back the drink, how is she not constantly drunk??

"Well, you're the most action we've seen in a while, so don't be surprised if it's like this for a while." 

"Thanks." I rolled my eyes at her and swung my feet off the side of the tower, "I'll see you later." 

She dismissed me with a nod and lifted her drink in my direction. I decided to take the ladder slow, I was a little tired after my run and probably needed to get some food. 

"Hey Vris," Kanaya jogged over to me as I reached the bottom of the ladder. I watched her eye my burns, checking for any signs of infection. "We're getting breakfast, want to join us?" She pointed her thumb to Tavros and Gamzee who were unloading their bags and sorting the supplies. 

"I was just thinking about breakfast," I gave her a crooked smile, I was sure they wanted me to join their team and find a permanent spot in their little village here. But I'll definitely try to stick it out on my own. I can't have anything tying me down. 

"We were thinking we could move a spare mattress up into the attic if you wanted, it would be nice to have a girl up there." She gave me a curious glance, maybe she could read my mind.

"I don't know, Kanaya, it's already a little crowded up there, I don't want to take up any more of your space."

"As if, I'll get it set up," Kanaya smiled at me, and I knew instantly what she was planning. It's going to be a sad goodbye when I'm finally even with them. 

I couldn't say anything else because Tavros started filling me in, we walked to the dinning room while he pointed out different symbols on the map showing me how they planned their supply runs. 

"Wow Tav, you've got a great setup there, who came up with that?" I watched Tavros' cheeks change shades.

"I-I did," He gave me a shy smile, "I played a lot of, uhh, RPG's, um, before all this happened."

"What the hell is an RPG?" 

I guess that wasn't a very nice way to ask because Tavros buried his face in the map and started mumbling to himself. 

"Oh don't you dare," I pulled the map out from his fingers, careful enough to not tear it, but forceful enough to completely strip it from his hands. "What are you getting embarrassed about? It was just a question." The map fluttered to the ground. 

"Oh Vriska, leave him alone." Kanaya picked up the map and handed it to Gamzee who folded it back up.

"Why? I didn't do anything." I crossed my arms and glared at Tavros. 

"It means, uh, Role playing game." Tavros stared at the ground. 

"You mean like dungeon and dragons? My brother used to play that with his college buddies." I winced at the memory, my brother was the smartest person I knew, so it had to be a difficult game. "He never let me watch them play, he always said I wouldn't be interested in it because I had no imagination and I would probably ask too many questions." I chuckled at how well he knew me. 

"You have to have a, uhh, big imagination to play, uhh, but it's not a hard game. Once you get used to it." Tavros looked up, the blush had faded to just his cheeks and he had a shy smile. 

"Well, I think it's great you can apply a game to our situation here." I tapped his shoulder with my fist and grinned. Tavros is a sweet guy, another reason I'll be sorry to go. 

"Come on, I'm hungry," Kanaya wrapped her arm around mine and started pulling me toward the line for breakfast. Tavros and Gamzee followed, Gamzee ruffled Tavros' hair and I watched him try to fix it. It was an overgrown mohawk, but it was still endearing. Gamzee, on the other hand, wore his mop lose and curly, it hung right bellow his shoulders and he always seemed to be pushing it out of his face. 

For breakfast being the 'most important meal of the day' it never failed to make me nauseous. My usual routine was crackers and water to make my stomach think I was full. I'll get spoiled with every food group pilled on my plate. While I settled for toast and jam, Kanaya decided to put scrambled eggs and an orange on my plate. I glared at her, but she just ignored me.

I didn't notice Jade was in front of me until I practically stepped on her.

"Hey, Vriska, haven't seen you in the garden for a while." She smiled at me through her glasses. 

"I figured I was banned." 

"No way, I wouldn't do that, none of the plants were harmed!" She rolled a few of the bands on her fingers back and forth. "Plus, there was something I was supposed to tell you, but I can't remember." She stared at her fingers counting off the bands and mumbling their meanings. 

"Well, when you remember, you'll be able to find me." Not like I was leaving soon. 

"Okay, see you around!" She picked up her plate and strolled off. 

\--------

With a way too full stomach, because of Kanaya's nagging, I rolled onto my back and watched Tavros, Kanaya, and Gamzee jog the perimeter. I guess everyone had the same idea. 

"So is this how you get back in shape?"

Startled, I rolled onto my feet. Dave, with John is tow, was stretching his arms across his chest. They both wore sweats and a t shirt. 

"Already ran, just digesting breakfast." I wrinkled my nose and glared him down.

"Right." 

"You got a problem with how I do things?" I placed my hands on my hips and sneered at him. 

"I just can't believe you've made it this far," his tone really pissed me off because now I had something to prove. 

"Fine, lets spar." I said, "Your best versus me." 

"I don't think this is a good idea," John, who had finished his stretches, intervened. 

"I think it's a perfect opportunity to see what you're made of." 

Dave walked over to a rack and pulled a wooden Katana from the rack. I followed, a baseball bat was my first choice, but I didn't think it was fair to use the metal ones so I grabbed the other wooden Katana. I've never used a sword before and I know that you can't just swing it around like a baseball bat. I was only hoping it was the same concept as a machete.

We walked out to a clear space between the house and back wall. Dave, still wearing this stupid sunglasses with a crack in the lens, stood with one foot slightly forward and both hands on the handle of the katana, it pointed upward. I tried to mimic a similar stance, one handed with my left hanging to my side and my right hand holding the point down. 

At some point I lost sight of Kanaya and her group, probably near the front gate by now, I have about a minute before they can see me. I couldn't stand it if they broke up another grudge match. 

I lifted my chin toward Dave and asked, "Ready?" 

He nodded and moved, I knew he was quick, but I barely batted off his katana before he knocked me out. I spun around in time to see him make another move, I ducked and cut low, trying to throw off his balance. If I could just bruise a shin or ankle it would slow him down just enough, but of course he was quick on his feet and dodged mt attempt. On one knee I fended off a few hits from above, I could feel the speed behind the hits, but they don't hold a lot of strength. Sure if I got hit straight on, there would be a few bruises, but it wouldn't hurt much.

Suddenly I had a great idea, I stood straight up, taking a quick blow to the stomach, but before he could pull the katana back I grabbed the "blade" and pulled, Dave stumbled forward and I threw a roundhouse kick to his thigh. A quick "Umph" and we both dropped our "swords". He threw his arms up in surrender just as I threw a punch at his face. He quickly ducked out of the way.

"What the hell are you guys doing?!" Kanaya grabbed my arm as John jogged up to Dave, they exchanged a few words and john shook his head.

"What does it look like?" I pushed myself out of Kanaya's grip and rubbed my abdomen. Had that been a real sword, I would have been completely gutted. Good thing I got a kick in. One point each proved enough to me. 

"Kanayaaa, Gamzee, you're too fast." Tavros jogged up to us, panting heavily, they must have been just past the front gate, how Kanaya knew I was getting into trouble, who knows. maybe she has a radar.

"You just have short legs," I joked, but with how he was panting, it was a wonder he didn't pass out. 

I watched Dave glance back at me and I sneered. There was no way he wasn't going to feel that kick for a few days. 

"Why do you have to agitate people? Come on Vris," She gasped when she saw my stomach, it is going to be a gnarly bruise. And i was regretting the half shirt. 

"It's nice to see Dave get stirred up over something," said Gamzee, smirking. 

"Stop instigating her!" Kanaya scolded. "And stop getting hurt!" 

"I guess I'm prone to hurt," I laughed and shrugged. I should probably get a cooling pack for my stomach. 

\--------

After getting cleaned up, Kanaya convinced Gamzee and Tavros to carry one of the spare mattresses from the garage to the attic. I offered my help but Kanaya said it was just a two person job. So I packed up my stuff from the room I was sleeping in and brought it upstairs. 

Kanaya and I sat on her bed brushing out the tangles in my hair, "Maybe I should cut it off."

"What?"

"My hair, it causes more trouble than it's worth, your hair seems so much easier to deal with." 

"No way, your hair is great! Smooth and shiny, it's very endearing."

"Sure, but not practical, even if I put it up it's still in the way." I shrugged. 

"I think you should keep it."

"Only if you'll brush the tangles out for the rest of your life." We both laughed, it was nice to have a friend. 

A few thuds warned us the mattress was on its way up, Kanaya jumped up and opened the door for Tavros who was walking backwards. He stumbled a little on the last step and Kanaya grabbed his shoulder to steady him.

"Thanks," Tavros wiped the sweat off his brow as Gamzee pushed the mattress in the rest of the way. 

"Kanaya and I have it from here, you guys should go clean up. Lunch should be ready soon." 

"Maybe you should grab it and bring it here, we've got to move some stuff around anyway."

"No problem," Gamzee gave us a toothy grin and Tavros followed him out. 

Kanaya and I shuffled furniture around to make way for the full size mattress. It was a tight fit, but it seemed to balance out the room. Kanaya cleared out one of the junk nightstands and I was able to put the few belongings I had in the drawers. She tossed me a few items of clothing she didn't wear and I couldn't help but feel like I had a place here. It was a very strange feeling, and I could feel the tears bubbling up. 

"I'm going to go wash my hands." I darted out of the room before Kanaya could register the crack in my voice. I hated letting my emotions catch up to me, it was easy to be emotionless when you'e on the run, no one to look out for and no one to leave behind. Many sleepless night had turned my heart to stone. I had thought I lost every feeling except rage. It was what kept me going, why I picked fights, why I could get this far. Without rage fueling me I was just the helpless brat that watched her parents get torn apart. I covered my mouth to hide my sobs and shrunk down against the bathroom door. I was better than this, I am better than this. I cant let these emotions control me. I tried to even calm my breathing, in through my nose and out my mouth. I could slowly feel my emotions calm. Bit by bit my heartbeat slowed and by breathing became even, calm. 

"Vriska?" Gamzee's voice broke my concentration and I knit my eyebrows.

"What?" My voice was hoarse and I was hoping I sounded mad, and not like I just cried my eyes out. 

"Lunch is in the attic." 

"Okay I'll be right there." 

"Can you open the door, Vriska?" 

I tried to focus on his voice, to imitate the calm tone, "If you have to use the restroom, you could have just told me." 

I stood up and turned the door handle. The door opened without my help and I stared at Gamzee's chest. If I let him see my face, he would know how weak I let myself become. I watched him take a breath and lift his knuckle to my cheek. Shit. He swiped a tear from my cheek and I rubbed my eyes.

"You can laugh at me if you want."

"Why would I do that?" There was genuine confusion in his voice. 

Without realizing it I met his eyes, the tears threatening to fall at any second, "Because I'm weak." I closed my eyes and held my breath, waiting for him to laugh at me and confirm what I already knew. But there was nothing. Only silence. 

I flinched when I felt his thumb dry another tear that fell without permission. "I would never laugh at you for being human." 

I opened my eyes and stared into his, he seemed to have this manic look to him at any given moment, but all I could see right now was understanding. I don't know how he did it but my heart fluttered in my chest. "You said lunch was here?"

I watched his face fall back into it's usual smirk, but there was a something different about his eyes still. Like once you see them differently, they're never the same. Gamzee turned toward the stairs and I followed. I was definitely much calmer than before and I could face my temporary life again. We reached the top of the stairs and I nearly ran into Gamzee when he left his hand on the door, without turning the knob. 

"Are we going in?" I joined him on the top step and eyed him.

"Yes, but first," Gamzee leaned in toward me and pressed his lips to the corner of my eye. I froze, stunned by the way it made my blood rush to my face and my heart pound in my chest. It was such a simple gesture, and while I've gone much much further than a simple kiss, it was very different than my last boyfriend. 

Before I knew it, the attic door was open and Gamzee had made himself comfortable on the couch with a sandwich and bottle of Faygo. I touched the warm spot where he kissed me. Every ounce of blood hushing to my face. 

"Vriska?" Kanaya broke through my train of thought and brought me back to earth. 

What The Hell Was That?!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll finish this chapter by apologizing for my hiatus. Excuses are stupid and I suck.


	4. And a One, Two, Three Ching Chong Potato

I have officially turned into a tower potato. 

My new friend, Roxy, who I have been hiding out with for the past couple days, has supplied me with a few too many tasty drinks. I rolled onto my side, watching walkers roam through the houses across the street. A couple drop to the ground as Dirk and Dave slice through their necks. Apparently, it was the most fascinating thing I could watch right now. 

"It's a sport to them," Roxy pointed my entertainment, "Dirk hasn't lost to Dave, ever."

"Isn't it, hic, like, big brother code to go easy on your younger siblings?"

"Not with these two," Roxy took a sip of her drink. She's had twice as many as me, but completely composed, while I'm completely trashed. 

"Well, I guess if my brother was still around, hic, I wouldn't really want him to go easy on me, either." The thought was slightly sobering so I took another gulp of my drink. That'll teach those thoughts a lesson. HA!

"Vriskaaaa," I heard Kanaya calling me, hoping if I ignored her, she would find something else to do. 

"Your girlfriend's looking for you." Roxy pointed in Kanaya's direction.

"I'm not here." 

"You should really talk to her." For being only a couple months older than me, she sure acted like an adult. 

"Don't, hic, make me." 

"I'll kick you out politely, or rudely, either way, you should talk to her." She made a shooing gesture with her hands. 

I reluctantly stumbled down the ladder. My right hand hurt as it slid down the rope, but I realized, unless I put my left hand in a TON of pain, I couldn't feel a thing. 

"There you are," Kanaya jogged up to me. "We should apply your aloe, I haven't seen you in almost three days." She wrapped her arm in mine and pulled me toward the house. 

"I didn't really want to see, hic, anyone." 

Kanaya stopped, "Are you drunk?" 

"Hic" That probably wasn't the best answer, but I couldn't help it, I was definitely, very, drunk. 

"Dammit, Vris, we're on night watch," Kanaya rushed me into the house and pushed me up the stairs. My head started to spin half way up.

"I want to sit down," I tried to push against Kanaya, but she kept my momentum forward, and my feet stumbled to catch up.

"I can't have you falling on the stairs, Vris." 

"I can fall, as long as I fall on my left side, I'll barely feel it!" I waved my left arm around and Kanaya shook her head. She was there when Dr. Greg tested that theory out. 

"I don't want you to get hurt, Vriska." There was tenderness in her tone that I missed, because I am drunk. 

I pushed open the door, Gamzee and Tavros instantly looked up at us. I felt the blood rush to my face, I was definitely still embarrassed about the last time I saw Gamzee. Sure I was experienced, it's not like my last boyfriend and I waited very long before he took me to his bed, but it had definitely been a long time since anyone got that close to me. Well, besides Kanaya, and she's like a sister.

"It seriously took two days, but I tracked her down." Kanaya patted my back.

"I have been found," spreading my arms out wide I gave them a lopsided smile, "I am the champion of hide and go seek."

"Should we give you a prize?" Gamzee asked, giving me a sly smile, my stomach fluttered.

"I don't want any prizes from you," I stick my tongue out at him, but he only broadened his smile. 

"Come on, Vris, let's get you changed." Kanaya pulled at my arm.

"Why?" I asked as she pulled me being the curtain. Kanaya had insisted we put one up because even thought Roxy didn't care that I only slept in a baggy t-shirt and undies, Kanaya didn't want my sleeping habits exposed, literally.

"I told you, we're on night shift, we need to sleep for a few hours, you especially need to sleep this off." Explained why Gamzee and Tavros were in their pajamas. 

Behind the curtain, Kanaya helped me change, it was difficult because I was apparently ticklish, like, everywhere! At some point, someone announced they were going to get some food. I don't remember when or who, but the door closed over the sound of my giggles. 

"Hold still, dammit." Kanaya struggled with my bra, as soon at it was off I let out a huge sigh. Bras are so uncomfortable when you're drunk. She tossed my baggy t at me and a pair of shorts. 

"I'm not sleeping in those," I threw them back at her.

"Fine, but you're wearing them while we eat." 

"I'm not hungry."

"I don't care, you're going to put these on," she threw the shorts back at me, " and you're putting something back in your stomach before you go to sleep."

"I'm not tired."

"I don't care that you're not putting the shorts on, or that you're not hungry, or that you're not tired, you're going to do what I tell you to, and you're going to do it now!" The other side of the tent, our roommates burst out laughing. I hadn't realized the food was back, but I could now smell it and my stomach rumbled in response. 

"You would make a great mom, if this was any kind of environment to have demon spawn." I laughed at my joke, realizing if children were literally hell spawn, this would be the perfect environment.

"Babies aren't demon spawn," Kanaya crossed her arms. 

"Yes, they are, they cry, all the time, plus they can't even clean up their own mess. It's hell, for approximately eighteen years or more."

"No, that's life, what we're doing now is hell. I would rather raise ten kids than live like we are now." 

"Not me, I'd rather kill for the rest of my life, it's easier to end life than it is to create it." 

"To each their own, lets eat."

"I'm not hungry."

"Not this again."

My brain was wrong and my stomach was right, as soon as Kanaya convinced me to put pants on and I stumbled out from behind the curtain, my stomach rumbled again. I stuck to the dry foods, bread mostly, and a couple pieces of chicken. I could feel the alcohol being absorbed in my stomach, and my mind was clearer. And so was the headache that now replaced the buzz of liquor. I rolled onto the couch from where we were sitting on the floor, suddenly very tired.

"Vriska, if you're going to sleep, use your bed." Kanaya nudged me from her spot in front of the couch. 

"I'm not going to sleep," I mumbled.

"Sure you're not, but we are," she stood up and nudged me again.

"Fineee," I rolled back off the couch, cradling my head, I would literally kill for some aspirin right now. "Good night, fuckers."

"Want me to tuck you in?" Gamzee asked, I turned to see his usual sly smile.

"I have Kanaya for that," I replied, wrapping my arm around her shoulder for emphasis.

"What am I? Your nanny?" Kanaya poked my side, at least I wasn't ticklish any more.

"I never had a nanny, but you could be my first," I winked at her.

"No thank you, you're enough work as it is," she laughed pushing the curtain to the side, "good night, guys, see you in a couple hours."

I feel back onto the covers, pushing off my shorts and wrapping myself in the comforter, evenings were getting cold, and I was going to have to raid a department store for some decent winter clothes soon.

\--------

I woke up freezing, the sun was setting and I was trying to figure out why I never wore pants to bed. I looked down at my legs, completely twisted in the sheets. That's why. After some maneuvering and kicking, the sheet was off, why was I asleep so early? Oh right, night watch. I pulled on a pair of baggy jeans and changed my shirt. Remembering the jackets in the gun closet, wait, the weapons in the coat closet, whatever it doesn't matter, I changed into a tank top. Built in bras are the best. 

Kanaya stirred in her bed, I swear she has a frequency set on me, "Vriska?" 

"Yeah?" I whispered, not sure why I needed to, everyone needed to wake up anyway.

"Will you wake up the guys? I want five more minutes." 

"Ok," I slipped to the other side of the curtain.

Gamzee's mattress was the closest and he can wake up Tavros. Except, he was laying on his stomach, and somehow he could sleep with his face directly in the pillow, his hair in a complete birds nest, I'm pretty sure his face didn't actually exist anymore. I nudged his arm, nothing, then I shook it, still nothing. I stood there for a second, there was a little bubbly part of me that wanted to lay down next to him to see if he could even sense someone else in the bed, I punched that part of me in its face, blaming it on my metabolism for not getting rid of the remaining liquor in my system. Grabbing his pillow, I pulled it out form under his face, it was one of those water pillows for supper awesome neck support. Though, I'm not sure it works in his case.

I bent over, just a couple inches from what I assume was the vicinity of his face and said, "wakey wakey."

"Get. The. Fuck. Away. From. Me." I heard him growl from behind his hair. 

"Well fine," I backed away and lifted the pillow above his head.

"Vriska! Don't-" Kanaya warned before I dropped it on his head. 

In a flash, my arm was jerked forward and my body followed, I instinctively tucked my shoulders and attempted to use the momentum and roll away, but his grip was too strong, and I only ended up on my side with Gamzee's weight on top of me. The edge of the bed was just centimeters away, but with my arm twisted behind my back, I felt instant dislocation when I pushed his weight over the bed. I moved as quick as I could and pinned his elbows with my knees and slapped him across the face. He went slack under my weight, blinking a few times, as if to clear his head. 

"What the fuck?" He said in confusion

"That's one he'll of a way to wake up," I cradled my dislocated arm and pushed my weight off him and rolling into my back.

 I glanced up at Tavros, who was rolling out of bed, "Well, everyone's up now." The pain in my voice must have been obvious because Kanaya was kneeling next to me in seconds, inspecting my arm. "It's just dislocated." 

"Dammit, Vriska, this is all my fault," Kanaya helped me sit up, being extra careful with my  shoulder. 

"Why, it was a simple enough task, which I completed," I tried to laugh but it came out more like a cough. 

I turned toward Gamzee, he rubbed his cheek and looked like hell. 

He looked at me for a moment before dropping his head into his hands, "I'm so sorry." 

"Ah, hell. Tavros, are you going to claim this is your fault too? Because this is ridiculous." I stood up and shook Kanaya off. "I'm going to find Dr. Greg so he can pop my arm back in place, and then we have a job to do. You can either wallow here or hop to it." I stomped out of the room, feeling I made quite a valid point. With the shit going on outside the walls of this temporary 'sanctuary', there was no need to walk around on egg shells. 

\--------

"This time, I will gladly accept the pain killers," I said while Dr. Greg escorted me into his tent. 

He laughed, "You proved to be quite tough the first time around, what changed your mind?"

"The first time," I smiled as he sat across from me and handed me a glass of water and white pill. 

He shook his head as I popped the pill in my mouth and chased it down with the water. 

"So tell me, what happened this time?" He gave me a second to compose myself and I looked away. 

"I tried to wake up Gamzee," I felt his hand on my wrist and another under my arm. 

"Ah, that explains it," he grunted as he pulled my arm and pushed my side. It popped back into place, I clamped my jaw shut and squeezed my eyes closed. 

"God that hurts," I finally said, letting the air out of my lungs slowly. 

"I would tell you to be more careful, but with how often you;re in here, I know my breath would be wasted."

"And that's why you're the best doctor I've ever had," I gave him a broad smile, the pain in my arm was completely gone. 

"Alright get out of here before you make an old man cry," he turned in his chair, putting away a bottle of pills. 

"Thank you, I mean it."

\--------

"Alright, ladies, lets get to work." The sun was just barely above the horizon, and it was time to change posts. 

"Are you sure you still want to do this?" Kanaya put her hand on my arm.

"Seriously? I've been begging for something to do, and Dr. Greg didn't say I had to sit out." I shrugged out of her reach, instantly regretting it after the look on her face. 

"Fine, but I'm not letting you near a gun. Gamzee, Tavros, and I with take the towers, you can go with whomever you want, but we'll need you to rotate around and keep us awake, since you're so good at that."

"Fine," we glared at each other for a second, "I'll keep Tavros company first."

"Fine."

The three of them started off in different directions, and I followed Tavros to his tower. 

Once I knew only Tavros could hear me, I spoke, "Sorry." 

"W-what for?"

"Using you to get away from that, I couldn't handle being with Kanaya, we'd just argue and probably end up with a horde attacking."

"And Gamzee?"

"My slap mark is still on his face."

He snorted, "They'll be fine, we're a team."

"Thanks, Tavvy."

"W-well, it's t-true," he shook his head.

Tavros held the bottom of the rope ladder.

"I'll go first, who's up there?" 

"J-Jake, John's cousin." 

Right, I've seen him with Dirk and Roxy. I climbed up, slowly, because of my shoulder. I poked my head over the platform, "Night shifts here." 

I stared down the barrel of a gun, it was quickly withdrawn and a voice followed, "it's not a good idea to speak up on someone."

"It's also not a good idea to shout at night." I glared at him. 

"Ah the newbie with an attitude problem. I've heard about you from Drik's little bro."

"I'm sure it's all true, now are you going to bed? Or should I go back to mine?" My arms were getting tired from holding on to the side of the tower, and he was completely irritating. Hair spiked forward, and rectangular glasses resting on the end of his nose. 

He pushed his glasses up his nose and held his hand out, "Jake."

I gripped his forearm and allowed myself to be pulled up, "Vriska."

Tavros was quickly up the ladder, they nodded to each other, "Have a quiet night."

I watched him crawl over edge and drop to the ground, the perks of being tall.

All the lights inside the wall were dim, to attract as little attention as possible, but the sun had just slipped under the horizon. Gamzee and Kanaya were situated in their towers. Three shadows making their way to the dining hall confirmed we were ready for the long haul. 

"How long before the others will need company?"

"Probably an hour, we're not u-used to a fourth person, so that's usually when we start feeling restless."

"No wonder Roxy's always got a drink, this is going to be a long night."

"It's really hard on teams of t-three, Roxy's team all have their v-vices, that's w-why Jade's team is probably is probably the strongest," he paused contemplating his next words, "that's also why we need you to stay."

He held my gaze for a second, before looking away shyly.

"So you guys need me, but you don't really want me to."

"W-w-w-WHAT? No, w-we want y-you to stay, too." He pushed his hands to the side of his head and ruffled his hair.

"I know what you meant, Tavvy," I grabbed his hands and pulled them away from his head, "I'll think about it."

"Why do you want to leave?" Tavros held my wrist, unconsciously, and when he realized it, he let go and looked out over the wall. "Y-you don't have t-to t-tell me, i-if you d-don't want to."

I thought for a second, and decided to just think aloud, "You know, Tavvy, I'm not really sure, I'm really glad I found this place, and this is really an amazing place." Tavros returned his gaze to me, but I stared at my hands in my lap. "But I've been alone for so long, I've learned to look out for myself, and myself alone. I don't think I can handle looking out for anyone else. And I don't want to see anyone due. If I'm on my own, I don't have to deal with that. And if I die out there, alone, no one is left to mourn it."

"Oh but Vriska, we know you now, you've made quite the impression on everyone here, how you found us without the radio broadcast, how you defeated a rabid zombie and a bloater on your first day here. If you leave, we're just going to be left wondering if you're alive, how far you've gone, if your hurt somewhere with no one around to help you."

"I didn't find you guys because of dumb luck." I confessed. "I did hear the broadcast, I just lost my radio running from a horde, I just wanted you guys to think I was lucky, and not a jinx, because that's what I really am."

"You're not a jinx, Vriska."

"Oh, but I am. It was my fault my parents are dead. I begged them to go into the city so I could save my brother and my boyfriend. They would probably be here with me if I didn't bring them to their deaths." I clenched my eyes closed, holding back the tears of regret. "I tried to go alone, but they wanted to protect me, and now they're dead, I can't be protected." 

I wiped my eyes, there was something I trusted about Tavros, something in his eyes that gave me a sense of trust. That told me he wouldn't laugh at me.

"Then I won't protect you," I looked up at him, "I don't want to die, so I won't protect you. You've made it this far on your own right? So you don't need us to protect you, but I want you to stay. So, e-everything should be f-fine."

I let out a quick laugh, holding my hand over my mouth to stop the noise. I laughed into my hand for a good minute. It was nice to laugh, even though we're surrounded by death, Tavros could make me laugh. If I left, I would never have that again. 

"Thank you, Tavvy. Really." I ruffled his hair, "I should go talk to Kanaya, I'll be back in a couple of hours." 

We smiled at each other as I made my way over the side of the tower. 

"See you in a couple of hours," he said as my head dipped out of sight. 

\--------

I stood at the bottom of Roxy's tower, It was in between Jake's and Dirk's, realizing I had no idea which tower Kanaya was in. I held my breath. If Gamzee was in this tower instead of Kanaya, it would be a very awkward hour. I had no idea what to say, especially if he tried to apologize. Letting out the breath I held I climbed the ladder. A candle candle was on the edge, the light was dimmed by the candle holder, only letting out a dim light. Kanaya sat on Roxy's beach chair, rifle on her lap. Her head nodding forward. 

"If you want to take a nap I'm here," I whispered 

Her head jerked up and she looked around, "Vriska?"

I crawled onto the tower, my shoulder starting to hurt. 

"Yes, I'm glad my guess was right, I really want to talk to you." 

"I want to talk to you too." 

"Good, so me first."

I restated the majority of what I told Tavros, summarizing certain points and pouring my heart out, again. 

"So, that's why you want to leave." Kanaya left her voice low, her eyes bore into mine.

"Well, yea," She didn't ask a question, so I answered her statement. 

"That's stupid." 

My eyes opened in shock, who would have thought Kanaya could be so heartless.

"I'll say it again, Vriska, that's stupid, you're not a jinx, and you're not going to get anyone killed but yourself if you keep up this nonsense." 

"You just don't understand."

"Yes, I do, you just don't listen. We've all lost people to those monsters. We've seen death, we've looked them in the eyes and saw nothing left of our families. Most of us killed people we know, people we love, and we're all here. Helping each other move on, survive, and you're the only person who thinks the death around us is your fault. That's stupid."

"Ouch, Kanaya, you really know how to hand it out." 

"I'm serious, Vriska. We're not weak, and you don't have to leave because of stupid reasons. I don't want you to leave."

"Well before you called me stupid, I wasn't even sure I wanted to leave anymore." 

"I didn't call you stupid." 

"That's what it sounded like."

"Tavros is right. You don't need us to protect you, and we don't need you to protect us. We look out for ourselves first and each other second." 

I glanced out over the wall, it was very quiet tonight. We're pretty lucky to be able to talk out our issues like this, without having to shoot anything down. I watched a walker make its way down the street, contemplating my next words.

"Kanaya, you're a great friend."

"And you're a pain in my ass."

"No, I mean it. I'm really going to really think about staying here, but I want you to know if I decide to leave, you're the best friend I ever had." I've turned corny in the dark of night. If i could I would take Kanaya's rifle and shoot myself in the foot for that statement. 

"Don't try to butter me up, Vriska," Kanaya poked me with her foot. 

"Shut up, I'm really opening up my heart to you over here, and you kick me while I'm down."

She laughed softly and I smiled up at her, if there was an alternate universe where we weren't friend, then I need to be punched in the face. 

"Do you mind watching the tower on your own? I have to use the restroom."

"Don't fall asleep in there, that's my next stop before I face Gamzee." 

"Let him apologize, it'll do you both some good."

She swung her legs over the tower and as soon she was jogging toward the closest house. I took up her chair and stared out into the night. Once again looking up at the stars that were so bright. Why did we ever ruin this sight with technology?

\--------

I met Kanaya at the bottom of the ladder, in the three minutes she was gone, my urge to pee had me hopping where I stood.

"Hurry, I have to go so bad." I handed her the rifle, she gave me a quick hug and I took off into the house. 

I ran some water over my face and cleaned out my eyes. Braiding, and re braiding my hair, I stalled. I still couldn't think of anything to say to Gamzee. We weren't really ever alone, and after our incident earlier, I wasn't sure how this next hour was going to go. 

I sighed and exited the bathroom. I'm sure Gamzee was nodding off by now, maybe he could just take a nap and I can keep watch instead of talking. 

I climbed the ladder and knocked on the floor of the tower, Dirk had a nice setup. A cooler, currently holding a couple bottles of Faygo, and a couple pillows. There were two walls, blocking my current view of the towers Tavros and Kanaya were occupying. They weren't very high so I could probably see over them while sitting.

"Hey," I greeted.

"Hey," he replied. 

Well, I was already out of words.

"Sooo," I started, completely loosing any train of thought I may have had.

"Did you and Kanaya make up?" He asked, with only slight interest in his voice. 

I sat down on one of the pillows he wasn't using. "Yea, she called me stupid, though."

He shot me a sly smile, but it quickly faded when he looked away. 

"Well, Tavros doesn't think I'm stupid. Do you?"

"You're reckless." 

"Ouch, nothing but insults, I should just go back to Tavros." I started to push myself up, but Gamzee's hand on my knee stopped me. 

"I'm sorry," It was dark and the only light came from the moon and stars. The shadow of his hair covered most of his face, and I could only make out the tight line of his lips. 

"You haven't done anything to be sorry about."

"I have, especially earlier. I'm not myself when I wake up."

"Well, I'm not the nicest person when I wake up, but I've never attacked anyone because of it before. Well, not with the intention of hurting them at least." I blushed at the memory. That was a great way to wake up.

"I'm sorry."

"Listen, I don't want an apology, I'm over it, so you should be too. Plus, I got my revenge with how long your face stayed red." I leaned forward and poked his cheek. He smiled and I saw a small indent of a dimple. 

"Glad you consider us even, considering a slap is nothing compared to a dislocated shoulder," he grabbed my finger that was still poking his cheek. "I'll bite it if you don't stop."

"You promise?" I winked at him, Where did that come from? The butterflies were back the instant my finger was wrapped in his grip. and I felt my heart flutter. 

He only smiled broader.

I pulled my finger from his hand placing it in my lap. I felt like I needed some distance, that smile was was making my blood rush to my face. The desire to close the distance between us scared me and I felt myself go rigid, holding back my own desires. There was no way I was getting involved with anyone when I was unsure of my decision to stay.

"Why did you kiss me?" I blurted out. Damn my mouth.

"What? Oh. Just forget about that."

What, oh hell no. I wanted to slap him so much, but I only clenched my hands into fists and glared at him. He seemed to realize how stupid that statement was because he knit his brows together.

"I didn't mean it like that, fuck." He ran his hand through his unruly hair, pushing it back out of his face, but seconds later if fell back.

"Whatever, I can forget it." 

"Shit, Vriska, I didn't mean to make you angry." He brushed his hair away again, but it wasn't going to stay back. "You disappeared on is after that, and I thought you didn't want to see me."

"Well, that's true, but it wasn't because I didn't want to see you. I just didn't know how to face you. I was very shocked." 

"Oh."

"I can ask you again."

"What?"

"Why you kissed me," we stared at each other for a second. 

"You looked beautiful."

I stared at him, shocked, my mouth opening and closing, but no words came out. I took a breath.

"After crying?" I finally said.

"Well before that too," he looked away, "I watched you take out that bloated zombie. You looked so fierce, completely focused on taking it out. I watched as the spray of acid shot back at you. I thought the universe was playing a cruel joke on me. Showing me such beauty, and then taking it away." 

"Wow."

"Shit, you probably think I'm insane." He kept his eyes away from me.

"Well, yes," I started, his gaze darkened, "but not because of that."

Finally he looked at me. His gaze lowering to my neck where the burn started. 

"You're still beautiful." 

For a second, the world faded away, his words playing through my mind a million times, all I could see was his eyes, a gaze that held mine, unflinching. His eyes lowered to my lips, they were parted slightly in surprise. I felt my body move on its own, inching forward. He followed, an inch was all that separated our lips, I closed my eyes, waiting. I felt his hand find mine and we intertwined out fingers.

"Please stay," he whispered, I felt his breath on my lips.

I pulled back, breaking our connection, I looked down at my hands, one still warm from his touch. 

"I haven't decided." 

He sighed and leaned back onto the pillows. Disappointment hung in the air. I wish this was an easy choice. 

\-------- 

The rest of the night consisted of us rotating through the towers. Gamzee and I avoided each other, and Kanaya drilled me on why. I reluctantly told her and she only nodded in response. By the time the sun peeked its way over the horizon, I was exhausted. While the rest of the team made their way to bed I popped in the med tent and took another white pill. Heading strait to bed, only bothering to remove my boots, jacket and pants, as soon as my head hit the pillow, I was asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Get ready for an exciting fifth chapter! I have so many fun ideas!


	5. Family Ties

I woke up to the sun halfway across the sky. That pain killer really knocked me out. I was confused as to what had woken me up until Kanaya burst through the curtain.

"We've made contact with another group of people!" Her voice was coated in excitement.

"Really?!" I threw the seats to the side and grabbed a pair of shorts. The nights may be cold, but the days were still warm. I threw on a shirt and followed Kanaya down the attic stairs.

We raced across the lawn to the dining hall where the bell that woke me was being rung by a short stocky guy with cracked glasses. He held a vanilla envelope in his hand.

We were the last ones in and took a seat next to Gamzee and Tavros on the floor. I was a little hungry, but that could wait until after the announcement.

"So I'm sure word has gotten around," Equius spoke, was he sweating already? "we've made contact with a small group who is seeking temporary shelter on their way north." Clapping ensued. "They asked if I could list off some names of loved ones and friends, I know most of us are from here, but they insisted."

I tried to listen as he listed family names, but I recognized none.

"And finally, Serket."

I jumped up, I definitely hadn't misheard my own name, "That's me!"

Everyone turned their head towards me, and I shrunk in the instant lime light.

"Someone named Joshua-"

"Joshy!" I put my hand across my forehead, "He's alive."

My knees gave and I shrunk back to the floor, relief poured back through me. My brother is alive. I couldn't believe it. Kanaya was saying something next to me, but I returned my attention to Equius.

"I'll need to get back to them within the next twenty four hours, so we'll work out a plan to get them safely here." He cleared his throat, shopping off the sweat on his forehead. "Dismissed."

Everyone stood, Kanaya pulled me to my feet and dragged me out of the dining hall, Tavros and Gamzee followed. Once outside, I threw my arm around Kanaya.

"Joshy's alive," I squeezed her in my arms.

"Who's Joshy?"

I let her go, smiling, "My brother, oh I can't believe it."

My head was spinning, it felt like a dream, the one person left in my family, and he was coming here. I had to be on the team that brought them here.

"So I guess your team will be on the recon mission," Roxy sauntered over to our group. "Dirk and Dave are going to temporarily join your group, there's six of them and they're low on supplies."

I practically jumped up and down in excitement, "Joshy was in medical school, I'm so glad he's safe."

I beamed the biggest smile to my group of friends, I had a huge sense of pride that the Serket family had some resilient genes.

"Oh Vriska, I'm so happy for you," Kanaya wrapped me up in a hug. Tavros joined and Gamzee parted my shoulder.

"We're all very happy for you," Tavros added.

"Alright, I get it," I pushed them off me, "I'm getting claustrophobic."

I tried to calm myself down, but the smile wouldn't leave my face. I looked at my group of friends, there was something sad about their smiles, and my smile dimmed.

"What?" I asked.

"Well," Kanaya started, "They're heading north, so, I guess, we assumed you'd be going with them."

"Oh," my smile was completely gone now and my eyebrows drew together. "Wow, I hadn't thought of that." I looked at the group I just thought of as my friends. "I need some time alone. Let me know when we hear back from Equius."

I turned and jogged off. Straight to the med tent. Maybe Dr. Greg could help me clear my thoughts.

\--------

After I explained to Dr. Greg my dilemma, he just nodded in silence.

"Well?"

"I see your point, Vriska, but it's really a decision you're going to have to figure out on your own. I can't tell you how to live your life."

I let out an exasperated sigh. "Aren't you supposed to be super smart? You're the oldest person here, I need your wisdom."

"Sorry, Vriska, but this is a completely different environment than the one I lived in. We're all still just figuring this out."

"I know," I let out another sigh.

I heard to bell ringing, Equius must have gotten in touch with my brother's group. I raced out of the tent, giving Dr. Greg a quick goodbye.

I was the last one in the dining hall, and apparently everyone was waiting on me. I found my team and squeezed in next to them. Giving the best smile I could muster, I wrapped my hand in Kanaya's, trying to calm my heart.

"As you may have guessed, I was able to get in contact with the group traveling toward us." I sat up straight in anticipation. "They're camped out in a warehouse just outside of town. They've reported little, to almost no zombies. The group assigned to the recon mission are as follows," He paused to wipe the sweat from his forehead, "Dirk, Dave, Tavros, Gamzee, Kanaya, and Vriska. Report to the radio tent when you're ready to head out."

Today? I was shocked with how quickly we were moving out, it wouldn't be dark for a while, but did we really have time?

I followed my team back to our room, it was way too quiet as we changed and grabbed our supply bags.

Halfway to the radio tent, I stopped, "I want to be with my brother," Kanaya stopped and turned toward me.

"We know."

"But," I started, "I want to convince him to stay here."

Kanaya blinked, she wasn't expecting this. Neither was Tavros or Gamzee. I looked at each of them respectively before speaking again.

"I want to stay with you guys," I held up my hand to stop Kanaya from hugging me, "But if he refuses to stay, I'm going with him."

Kanaya looked down at her feet, took a deep breath and looked up smiling at me. "I can accept that."

\--------

Our mission was easy, Dirk and Dave would lead our group to the warehouse, since they grew up near there, we would find the group and stay the night. That would give my brother and his group the night to re hydrate, eat, and get a good night's sleep before following us back here.

We set out immediately, Jake and Roxy shot down the few walkers in the area surrounding the wall, clearing our path.

We wetter allowed to carry hand guns and ammo, but were told only to use them in an absolute emergency. Each of us were given two close combat weapons, I carried a metal bat and a crow bar stashed in my bag. We were loaded up with enough water and food to feed a small army.

Half way there, my smile came back. There were no zombies anywhere. I hoped our luck would last.

It was approximately five o'clock when we reached the warehouse. An older gentleman in army green was standing outside. A shotgun rested comfortably in his arms.

He nodded toward us, "Save the introductions until we're inside. I don't need to hear it twice."

He led us through a door on the side of the building and I instantly searched for my brother.

"Vriska!" I heard his voice come from the other end of the warehouse, I dumped my bag on Tavros after dropping the bat and took off.

"Vriska wait for us," Kanaya called and I heard my team follow, but I was sprinting.

Reaching a group of people setting much their tents, I scanned them for my brother, he stood up from taping a woman's wrist in a bandage. He stepped around her and held his arms open to me. I threw myself into his embrace and the water works started.

"Oh Vriska, I can't believe it. I thought I would never see you again."

"I'm so sorry Joshy, mom and dad-"

"I know Vris, you don't have to tell me, I'm just glad you're okay." He pushed me back so he could take a good look at me. A quick scan and my shirt was pulled up to show my stomach. "Oh Vriska, this looks terrible. It's healing nicely, but I can't imagine what you've been through."

"Thanks, bro. That's a real confidence boost." I chuckled, he pulled me back into a hug and we just stood there for a minute.

"Joshy."

"Yes?"

"I want you too meet my friends," I pulled out of his arms and gestured toward my team. Pointing to each respectively, "Kanaya, Tavros, and Gam-"

"Vriska." I heard am all to commissary voice call me. My heart stopped.

I looked around my brother and locked onto a familiar pair of blue eyes.

"Nick," I gasped.

"Hey, babe."

\--------

Apparently, I blacked out, because when the world came rushing back when I was pulled into an embrace. It was very familiar, but it didn't belong to my brother.

"Who's he?" I heard Kanaya ask. I don't know who she asked because I was frozen in place, my arms pinned to my side.

"Her boyfriend," my brother answered.

"Oh, Vriska, I missed this."

My voice wasn't cooperating, because all I managed was a small squeak.

He let me go, smiling softly, "You're so cute when you're shocked."

All I could do was look up at him, my jaw hanging open.

His face darkened as he took all of me in, "What the hell happened to your face? Holy Shit, what the hell happened to your body?"

"She was burned, jackass," Joshy put his hand on my shoulder.

"By what?" I couldn't help but notice the slight look of disgust.

"By acid, prick." My voice finally worked again, and it was very hoarse.

"Oh come on, baby," He smiled at me, "I remember how pretty you were, you know the scars won't bother me."

In my desire to return to my life before the apocalypse, I had completely forgot what a colossal douche bag Nick really was.

I rolled my eyes, unknowingly falling back into the pattern of every single one of our fights.

"You're such an ass, it's great do see a cockroach survive the apocalypse."

The smile dropped from his face, "And I see the apocalypse didn't make you less of a bitch."

I heard my brother start to herd my team in the opposite direction, "This is gonna take a while, let's get some water passed out."

They were strangely quiet, and I risked a glance over my shoulder, if looks could kill. I pointed my head in my brother's direction, encouraging them to follow. It took a second, but they complied, Tavros dragging Gamzee away. I remembered last night, when he called me beautiful. I wondered if he would still think that after seeing this.

"Are those your friends?" His tone was condescending.

I only glared back at him, daring him to say something about them so I had a good reason to kick his ass.

"I didn't know you could have friends."

"If you can get people to tolerate your presence, I can have friends."

"That's surprising, considering."

"Considering what?" I snapped.

He shrugged, "Considering your only talents are mixing drinks and warming my bed."

I lunged for Nick, popping him once in the nose, and another in the eye. There was no way I was going to let him disrespect me that much. The apocalypse changed us both.

"Fucking bitch," I watched him smear the blood dripping from his nose. Some girl was holding his arm trying to wipe the remaining blood off his face, glaring at me.

"I'm fine, let me go." I pushed away from the guy holding me back, and brushed off my hands, my knuckles were red, and I got the satisfaction of seeing I split to skin on one. His face was going to swell to the size of a baseball.

"Go cool off," Army guy pushed me in the opposite direction of Nick.

"Yea, yea."

\--------

I sat near the warehouse door, 'Keeping Watch'. I thought of it as glorified time out.

"Water, and food."

I didn't jump, I swear. Dave stood next to me, holding out a water bottle and a sandwich. drinking the water, I set the sandwich on my lap.

"You could do better."

"Thanks Dr. Phil."

All I felt like doing was wallowing in self loathing. Nick was ridiculous, I couldn't believe I loved him for so long. If the apocalypse hadn't happened, I would still be with him.

Dave, who sipped his water next to me, slid down into a crouch.

"What do you think you would be doing right now, if everything was normal?"

"Probably making sick comics."

"Seriously?"

"That, or John found this wicked game."

"Lame."

"Jealous," he laughed.

"Let me tell you, I am not jealous of your boring life," we shared a quick smile, or in his case, the corner of his mouth twitched upward.

"You should eat that. I'll watch the door. Kanaya's worried about you."

"Thanks."

"For?"

"Just accept my thanks."

"You're welcome."

I made my way through the tents, looking for either my brother or Kanaya.

"What did you even see in her?" Apparently I was forever dated to run into the lady person I wanted to see.

Nick, who was looking quite comfortable, with his head propped up on the lap of chick who glared at me earlier, and an ice pack, which she was holding, resting on his eye.

"Apparently I was great in bed." I looked down at them, hands on my hips.

"He's done with you now." Gods she was annoying.

"I thought that was apparent, considering," I gestured to the ice pack, which she was crushing against Nick's face.

"Oh My Goodness, baby, I'm so sorry!"

"I know there's no a great selection out here, but seriously, you couldn't do better?" I shook my head, walking away, "Good luck."

Luckily, my friends weren't far off. Gamzee, Tavros, Kanaya, and Joshy sat in a circle. Kanaya was giggling at something my brother said, probably at my expense.

"My ears are burning, Joshy, are you sharing something you shouldn't be?"

"Just that one time you were trying to impress my friends and broke your ankle trying to land a jump."

"Yeah, and how you ran crying to mom with snot running down your face."

"You little!" Joshy grabbed my knees pulling me onto his lap. He grabbed my sides, tickling me.

"Joshy, stop!" I laughed. "Joshy! Joshua!"

"Alright," he said when I elbowed his arm, "I'm done!"

He pushed me off his lap, and I took a breath before filling in the space between Joshy and Gamzee.

"Hi guys," I smiled brightly, tilting my head on my brother's shoulder.

"Feeling better?" Kanaya smiled back at me.

"My knuckles are," I said, cracking them for emphasis.

"I bet, they did some damage," Tavros circled his face.

"Good," Gamzee added.

"Oh agree!" I nudged Gamzee with my knee.

"Please don't encourage her," Kanaya and Joshy spoke at the same time.

"Could you guys be more alike, no wonder I like so much, Kanaya."

"By the way, Vriska has mentioned you were in med school," Kanaya glanced at me, then st my brother.

"Yes, I wanted to be a doctor because of Vriska's bike accident, the doctor that took care of her was so great, and that's why I wanted to be just like him."

"Yeah, this little honor student knows everything now, or so he says," I added.

"Oh Vriska, you're just jealous because you haven't found your calling yet," he flipped my braid in my face.

"But I have, I can kill zombies, and I'm good at it.

"Except when you get risky," Kanaya shook her head.

"My job is risky, but it has a great health plan," I winked at her.

"Not when the patient refuses treatment," we suck our tongues out at each other.

"That sounds accurate."

"What? I've changed," I flexed my arm, "I've got muscles now."

"A little too much," Joshy let out a tired sigh.

"Maybe you should go to bed, you'll be meeting a lot of people tomorrow," I leaned into my brother, and rubbed his back.

"It's do hard to get any sleep around here," He yawned.

"I know, just get some while you can," I watched him yawn again.

"Alright," he gestured to my team, "Watch her for me."

"I'm not a child."

"And yet you act like one." He crawled into a blue tent and plop down. He was asleep in seconds.

"How did he do that?"

"Your brother's a great guy," Kanaya moved herself closer to me.

"I know, the world deserves people like him."

"I know someone the world could do without," Gamzee smirked.

"Right? Gods I have a good list going."

"You guys shouldn't be allowed to agree on anything," Kanaya shook her head.

"But then you'd have nothing to worry about," I laughed.

"If only I could be so lucky."

"I can't wait until tomorrow," Tavros said, he seemed pretty excited.

"In crossing my fingers for a return trip the same as our walk here."

"I'm feeling pretty lucky, this isn't a big town." Kanaya rolled her neck, "There shouldn't be many zombies left in the area."

"Then maybe we can expand, get more land for farming and build more shelters." I nodded at my own good idea.

"We?" Gamzee pointed out.

"Why not, I just have to convince my brother. that shouldn't be hard. We're all that's left."

"Well, I think we're family now," Kanaya out her hand over mine.

"You're definitely the mom."

"Oh shut up."

"Let's grab some sleep, early day tomorrow," I suggested.

"Sounds good," Tavros agreed, but he was already on his back, using his bag as a pillow.

I followed his lead and rolled my jacket up and placed it behind my head, the ground was cool, but there was enough warmth in the warehouse that it felt nice.

The remaining lights dimmed in the warehouse, it looked like it was candle lit. rolling to my side I examined Gamzee's outline, wondering if Gamzee was the better that Dave was talking about.

I pointed his back, "Are you asleep?" I whispered.

"No," he whispered back, rolling over to face me. He was just inches from me, I was once again reminded of last night in the tower. I lied being close to him.

"I regret that you saw my argument with Nick," I kept my voice hushed.

"I regret not punching him," Gamzee reached for my hand, and I let him intertwine his fingers in mine.

"I don't."

"I'm glad someone did."

I let warmth from his hand warm me up, I felt good. Happy. Eventually I started to drift off to sleep. Gamzee pulled me toward him and I feel asleep in the warmth of his arms.

\--------

"Wake up," I heard Kanaya's voice in my dream, "Vriska, wake up."

"Hush," I scolded, "Five more minutes."

I was so warm, it felt Like I was curled up in my favorite comforter. I snuggled closer to the warmth, and felt it breathing.

"Are they awake?" I heard Tavros ask.

"Vriska is, she's just being stubborn." My brother answered. Right! My brother, I rolled out of Gamzee's embrace.

"Good morning, Joshy," I smiled up at his him and he held his hand out for me.

Gamzee mumbled next to me, as my brother pulled me up.

"Does he always wake up attacking people, or is that just me?" I stepped behind my brother.

"You just have to wake him up slowly," Kanaya answered, her hair was sticking up in the back and matted to the side of her face.

"Nice bed head," I laughed.

"Gamzee, it's Tavros," he mugged him with his foot.

"Go away," was the reply.

"That is our cue to walk away," Tavros backed up.

The rest of us followed, I pulled my brother with me.

"Why do we have to back up?"

"He doesn't do well with a rude awakening," I offered, "I learned that the hard way." My shoulder didn't hurt any more, but I still remember the pain.

"He'll wake up on his own now, and we'll be better off packing up our stuff," Kanaya said gesturing to our bags.

Joshy already had his on his back, it looked military issued and very bulky, a sleeping bag was strapped to the side and I'm sure his tent was in the bag. He was holding a half empty water bottle, and a crow bar. I looked around to warehouse, everyone was almost ready to go, I guess they were waiting on their guide's.

Dirk and Dave stood near the door, which was open. I quickly gathered my stuff, pushing some of Gamzee's things in his bag as he gradually woke up.

"What does he have?" Joshy asked me, his voice low.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, no one is that careful waking someone up."

I thought about it for a second, when I had slapped Gamzee, his eyes seemed to change, like he was waking up for a second time. He was very confused, but he apologized, so he had to be aware of what was happening.

"I don't know, I never thought to ask."

"I think it's borderline personality disorder, since when he's awake, I don't see any outstanding signs, except he seems wary and careful, but when you were arguing with Nick, Tavros had a mini freak out. Especially when we pulled him away, he was being very careful. I think heightened emotions may be a switch, he pushed Tavros away from him. and once he calmed, he didn't seem to completely recognize his surroundings."

I stared at him, it sounded pretty accurate, but I wasn't really around Gamzee when he was angry, besides yesterday, he always seemed laid back.

"It looks like he's been coping with it for a while now, with how smooth he transitions." Joshy had what I called, his doctor face.

I watched Gamzee look around for a second, registering everything around him. We locked eyes and he smiled. I returned the smile a little slowly and his brow twitched.

"We're heading home, do you want some water?" I asked him.

He nodded and zipped his bag shut. Joshy started to say something, but I gripped his arm, he stopped. I didn't want him to start diagnosing Gamzee, especially in a warehouse with people we just met. Gamzee eyed us.

"How far is your base?" He asked instead.

"Just a couple of miles," Gamzee answered, glancing at my hand on my brother's arm, "Why?"

"One of ours has a sprained ankle, I don't think he can walk all day, but a couple of miles won't hurt too much. Do you have medical supplies?"

"Dr. Greg has a pretty good set up."

"Good, he'll need a cot, I have some pain killers and wraps for him now, but he may need something stronger once we get there."

"Dr. Greg is really nice," I told my brother, "He and Kanaya treated my burns."

"Then I owe him." He ruffled my hair, messing my my braid.

"Seriously, Joshy," I undid my braid, letting my hair fall, it was almost as long as my hips. "It takes forever to braid my hair."

"Wow, it's so long, Vris, you need a haircut."

"So do you," I pointed to his shaggy mop.

"Right," Joshy used to wear his hair shaved on the sides, with just a little left on top, his hair was so unruly, if it wasn't short he couldn't do anything with it.

We joined everyone waiting for us by the door.

"All set?" Dirk asked.

Our group of twelve nodded.

Dirk and Dave took the lead, we each formed groups of two or three. Kanaya took my brother and they started chatting about the medical supplies they had, and I took up the rear with Gamzee and Tavros.

I looked ahead where Nick and that girl, someone called her Amber earlier, were walking. He had his arm wrapped around her shoulder. I sorted.

"He seems like such an ass hole." Tavros followed my gaze.

"It only took the zombie apocalypse for me to see it," I kept my tone light, "It was hard when I thought he was dead, but I guess it would have been easier. Life doesn't make things easy."

"Your brother doesn't seem to like him," Gamzee stated.

"He never did, I should listen to him more."

"I'm gland you found found your brother."

"Thanks, Tavvy." I felt more at peace with my brother around, he was generally my voice of reason.

After a couple hours, the houses around us started looking familiar, I jogged up toward my brother, who was now helping Andrew, the guy with a sprained ankle.

"We're almost there," I told him, "I can't wait for you to see it, it's a great space."

"I'll feel pretty good one we can relax," his breath was a little uneven from holding up Andrew, but he looked determined.

"We've got a few walkers up ahead," Dave have me a pointed glance.

"I'm in," I pulled the baseball bat from my bag, and handed my gun to my brother, "This'll be quick," I winked.

"Be careful, Vris."

"Always," I jogged up to Dave and Dirk, Gamzee and Tavros joined us at the front.

I glanced back at Kanaya, she fell back to the rear with army guy, Don, they both had their guns drawn, everyone else carried either crowbars or hunting knives.

"Ready?" Tavros asked me.

"I'm ready for anything," I smiled at him.

Gamzee elbowed me, "You look way to happy for someone about to kill zombies."

"What can I say, I've got some pent up stress to work out," I shrugged and they both smiled.

Dirk and Dave sprinted forward, taking down two zombies, now it was eight against five. I ran up the front of a car and smashed a walkers head with a golf swing. It fell to the ground and I slid off the car, there were three left, and one of them was in my path.

I stared toward it, it sensed me walking in my direction. I drew my bat up waiting for it to get closer.

A shot was fired and I felt it wiz past my head, my ear popped because of how close it was and watched the zombie drop, I turned around glaring at the group behind me, everyone looked confused. I looked past them through the houses and saw someone waving from one of the towers. Jake.

"I swear I'm gonna kick his ass," I stuck my pinky in my ear, trying to clear the ringing.

"Vriska," my brother called, "Are you ok?

"Yeah," I called back, "As soon as my ear stops ringing."

"That was a nice shot," Dave strolled up next to me, his sword covered in blood.

"That nice shot is going to get his ass kicked."

"Don't," Dirk came up behind his younger brother, with a matching sword, but a splatter of blood across his shirt. Behind his pointed glasses, I could see his glare, "You'd lose."

I rolled my eyes, we joined the rest of the group and finished our walk, zombie free.

As soon as we were inside the gate, I watched everyone spread out, I strode right up to Jake's tower and kicked the base.

"Hey! Next time you make a shot like that give my head some more room," I shouted up at him.

His head peaked over the side, "Couldn't help it, it was a nice shot."

I gave him the finger, take that shot.

He only laughed.

"So hostile," Nick said behind me.

I turned to face him, "Go fuck yourself."

"Point proven," He smirked, wincing when it hurt his eye.

I snorted, "I think my point was to stay away from me." I pushed past him.

His hand wrapped around my wrist, "Can we talk?"

I pulled my hand away, "I have nothing to say to you."

"Vriska," Kanaya called.

"I have more important things to do." I jogged off and joined Kanaya.

"What did he want?"

"Don't know, don't care."

"Oh, anyway, I asked your brother if he wanted to stay with us in the attic, he agreed, do if you want to show him the way after he finishes up with Dr. Greg, I'm sure he'd want a tour."

"Of course, I'll meet you guys there then."

"Okay, see you later." Kanaya waved and took off toward the dining hall.

I joined my brother in the medics tent, he was re wrapping Andrew's ankle. Dr. Greg say at his small table taking inventory. He glanced up at me.

"Ah, my favorite patient," Dr. Greg waved me over, "How's your shoulder?"

"Great," I smiled.

"Your mood has seemed to improve as well."

"How could it not, my brother's here." I posted Joshy on the back. He had finished with the wrap and turned toward us.

"I wanted to thank you for taking care of Vriska," he said to Dr. Greg, " I know she's a bit of trouble."

"We're just glad to have her. She may be in here often, but she's a great addition to our family." He gave Joshy a pointed look.

"I've always been proud of my little sis!" He wrapped his arm around my shoulder and pulling me into a hug.

"Oh, stop it," I pushed away, "you're embarrassing me."

He just laughed, it was so nice to hear it.

"So, would you like to see the place?"

"That would be great," He turned to Dr. Greg, "Thank you."

"You're welcome." Dr. Greg waved at us as we left.

Outside the tent, the group Joshy came with were seeing up their tents. I started by pointing out the gardens and the chicken coup.

"The last house is the dining hall, that's also where Dr. Greg's room is, and I think most of it is storage, water, canned goods, maps, and such," I gestured to the two remaining houses, "These two are residential, Dave, John, Rose, Jade, Dirk and Jake stay in there, it has more bedrooms, and also holds more weapons." We walked up to the house my attic was in, "And this one is my home, Roxy, Jane, Gamzee, Tavros, Kanaya, and I stay here. It only has two bedrooms, but the attic space is great."

"And that's where you and Kanaya sleep?"

"And Tavros and Gamzee," I added.

"You're joking."

"No, we hung a curtain up so it's like having two rooms."

He knit his eyebrows together.

"So killing zombies is fine, but not sharing a room with two guys?"

"I didn't say that," He said.

"But you thought it." I started up the stairs. This was going to be fun. I could already hear the lecture.

"When do we eat?"

"As soon as we get to the attic, someone usually brings enough food for all of us, I think Kanaya did this time."

I opened the attic door, instantly feeling the tension instantly.

"Took you long enough," Nick said, he looked quite comfortable on the couch.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" I pulled my brother out of the way and held open the door, "Get out."

"But, babe-"

"Don't call me that," I interrupted, "Leave."

"Fine, but you'll come around." He got up and walked past me, through the door. I slammed it shut.

"Prick."

Gamzee and Tavros sat on Gamzee's bed, eating sandwiches, and I saw Kanaya's outline on the other side of the curtain, she was changing.

"Yea, the curtain really gives you the sense of privacy," Josh, said pointing to Kanaya's outline.

"Don't start with me." I glared at him and he held his hands up in surrender. "Eat something, I have to put shorts on."

The jeans I had on were really uncomfortable, they kept rubbing against my burns.

"Go to the bathroom and change then," Josh looked at Kanaya's outline.

"Just look away," Gods he was pushing my buttons.

"Vriska," He warned.

"You can't tell me what to do."

"Fine, I give."

\--------

"Hey you," I greeted Kanaya on the other side of the curtain.

"Hey, Vris," Kanaya brushed her hair, it fell right into place, I should just shave my head.

I pulled off my pants, throwing them in the corner. I sniffed my shirt, gross. so I took it off to and threw it with the jeans. I heard a thump from the other side of the curtain.

"What?" I heard Gamzee say, followed by another thump. "Fine, I won't look."

Kanaya and I shared a look before busting out laughing.

"Just get dressed!" Joshy scolded us.

I pulled on my sleep shirt and my favorite pair of shorts, Kanaya gave them to me because she said her legs were too long to wear them. They were spandex, and my shirt slid over them. I always got a kick out of pushing my brother's buttons.

"Alright," I said pushing the curtain aside, "let's eat, I'm starving."

Instead of complaining about my shorts, my brother stared at my thigh.

"It goes all the way up," I sighed. Joshy looked so sad.

"I'm just glad you're still here."

"Gods this is depressing."

\--------

We ate, talking lightly about the area. Joshy was particularly interested in the hospital's and pharmacies in the area.

"So, Gamzee, are you supposed to be taking any medication?"

The room tensed, while I choked on my water.

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?"

"Josh," I warned.

"My sister's staying in a room with you, I want to make sure your personality disorder is under wraps."

Gamzee stood up, "That's none of your Fucking business."

"Joshua, really?" I watched Gamzee walk out, pushing his hair out of his face.

I stood up, "You needed to learn to keep your mouth shut." I glared at Josh and ran out the door. I took the steps as quickly as I could and caught a glimpse of Gamzee's back as he walked out the front door.

"Gamzee," I called after him, rushing out the front door. He turned, standing in the middle of the lawn. "Gamzee, I'm sorry about my brother."

I stood in front of him, looking up through his hair.

"I do have it though," Gamzee gave me a sad smile.

"I don't care," I shook my head, and took his hand.

"He's right, I've already hurt you."

"And I slapped you for it." I moved closer forcing him to look at me.

"I just," he started.

"Just?"

"I don't want to hurt anyone." I saw the pain in his eyes, "I don't want to hurt you."

"I won't let you," I squeezed his hand. "Well, most of the time."

He smirked, catching my innuendo.

"How cute," Gamzee's smirk faded and we both turned to Nick. He stood about three feet from us.

"Go away," Gamzee growled.

"Make me, ass hole."

Gamzee closed the distance, dropping my hand and grabbing the front of Nick's shirt.

"Listen here, you stupid mother fucker, if you you don't leave her the fuck alone, I Will End You."

I stood there in shock, I couldn't see Gamzee's face, but the look on Nick's was pure terror.

"Fuck man, alright, alright." He threw his hands in front of his face. "I'll go."

"Good," Gamzee pushed Nick back, he stumbled before he caught himself, taking a quick glance in my direction then he walked away.

"Sorry," He looked at me, "That wasn't my place."

"Thank you," They were the only words I could think of.

"Gamzee?" Tavros stood in the door way of the house, "Everything o-okay?"

"Yes, everything's great." He smiled at me. My heart fluttered, and I smiled back.

\--------

My brother left after we returned to the attic, he wasn't going to apologize, because he wasn't sorry. Gamzee sat next to me on the couch, I rested my head on his shoulder. Kanaya and Tavros had gone to the dining hall. Decided to help with dinner because of the six extra mouths.

"I could use a nap," I said in between yawns. Gamzee had pulled out my braid and was brushing his fingers through my hair.

"It has been a long day," he gestured toward the window, the sun was still high in the sky. "I can wake you up before dinner."

I pulled his arm around me and pushed myself closer to him. He rested his head on the top of mine. "I think this is better."

"At least you're comfortable."

"Are you not?" I sat up straight.

"Well, I could think of a more comfortable spot."

"Can you now," I raised an eyebrow at him.

"A few come to mind, actually."

"Oh really," I liked where this was going, "Want to elaborate?"

"Well, my favorite is spooning, and I don't know about you, but I like to be the big soon."

"Oh shut up you ass," I pushed his shoulder.

"Am I?"

"Yes, you and your hair too."

"My hair?"

"Yes." I pushed his hair out it off his face with both hands and held it there. "It's always in your face."

I studied his face, starting with his eyes, they were dark, like his hair, black lashes framing them. His nose was thin, curved slightly from an old break, he had high cheekbones, but they were soft, which contrasted against the sharp line of his jaw. I ended with his lips, they were thin, but full, he ran his tongue over his bottom lip.

I took a breath when he pulled me closer, my heart pounding in my chest. As soon as his lips touched mine, I thought my heart was going to explode. They were soft, I could taste the sweet faygo on his lips.

He was cautious at first, but the pace quickened. He pushed me down, so I was laying on my back, my hands moved from his hair to his stomach, pushing under his shirt. He held his weight off of me, one hand on the arm rest above our heads, the other by my side.

We broke free when I pushed his shirt over his head, but before his shirt touched the floor, his lips were back on mine. I slid my hands to his back, pulling him toward me. I bit his lower lip, as his hand slid down my thigh, pulling my knee up to wrap around his hips.

The warmth from his body fed the flames of our kiss, and I felt his hand grip the arm rest tighter. Taking my nails I dug them into his shoulders, he moaned into my mouth. I pulled them down his back and I could feel his excitement grow against my thigh.

He pulled away from the kiss, with a devilish grin on his face.

"What?" My voice was laced with lust, and his smile widened, revealing his pointed canines.

"We're moving."

Before I could ask where, he lifted me off the couch, pulling my other leg around him and carrying me toward the curtain, he kissed me as he pushed it to the side, and tossed me onto my mattress.

As a second thought, he disappeared behind the curtain. I heard the attic door lock and Gamzee reappeared, I admired him shirtless for a second taking in his toned muscles before my eyes moved lower. His pants were tight so the bulge pushed down the inside of the his pant leg.

"That doesn't look very comfortable," I brought my eyes back up, looking at him through my lashes.

"Yours for mine," he lowered himself onto the edge of the bed, wrapping his hands around my hips and pushing his thumbs into my sides.

I bit much lip, sighing with pleasure. He then slid his hands up my waist, pushing my shirt up and revealing my stomach. His hands felt weird against my scars, dulled compared to the right side, I could feel the calluses on his hands. He kissed my stomach, starting below my belly button and worked his way up. His hands cupped my breasts as he kissed my neck, rubbing his thumbs against my pointed nipples.

He pressed his hips between my legs, and I wrapped them around him. Moving his hands from my breasts, he pushed my shirt over my head, but instead of tossing it to the side, he balled it up over my hands, trapping them above me. He held it in place with one hand while the other traveled back down my torso.

"You're so beautiful," He whispered, studying my face.

He pressed his lips to mine and I opened my mouth to him. Our tongues twisted together as he pressed himself against me.

I wasn't sure if it was just my imagination, but I thought I heard footsteps on the stairs. Gamzee didn't react so I dismissed it, but then the doorknob turned. I felt Gamzee tense.

"It's locked, Tavros said from the other side of the door.

"Seriously?" Kanaya asked and I heard her try the knob. "Hello," she called, "We have dinner. If you haven't already eaten each other."

I felt Gamzee's excitement fade, "Fuck."

"You're telling me."

Gamzee pushed himself off me and walked to the door. Meanwhile I pulled my shirt back down and tried to push my hair back into a ponytail. It was a tangled mess, so a bun it is.

Gamzee opened the door.

"I was joking about eating each other, but I didn't realize how close to the truth I was."

"Just shut up and get in here."

I got up and pushed the curtain out of my way, "Great timing."

Gamzee's back was to me and I took pride in the eight red lines that ran down over his shoulder blades and stopped just below his ribs.

"Do you want to eat or not?" Kanaya lifted the plates in her hand.

I looked out the window and saw the sun, it hung just above the horizon. I had completely lost track of time. and my stomach rumbled.

"I could eat." We sat around the coffee table, which was unofficially our dinner table, since we've been eating there since for a few days now.

"H-have you seen y-your brother?" Tavros asked.

"Not since lunch, I've been here." I motioned to where Gamzee sad beside me, with his shirt back on.

Tavros turned a couple shades pink, which was always funny to see on his tan skin.

"I heard he's been asking around about some of the future plans for the place," Kanaya offered, "I heard he was bugging Jade so much about what she was planning with the expansion of her crops, she banned him from the garden." She laughed, "After she threw a tomato at him."

"I heard," Tavros started, "That Jane kicked him out of the c-chicken coup for asking about her p-plans to bring more animals in," he paused, "She told him she would make him eat cupcakes for as long as he was here if he didn't leave."

They laughed but I couldn't help but wonder what my brother was up to. He was way to smart for his own good, but he had no people skills.

Gamzee placed his hand on my thigh, "What's wrong?"

"I can't help but think he's got an agenda." I kept my voice down while Kanaya and Tavros chatted about the different cakes Jane made for holidays and birthdays.

"I'm sure he's just trying to look out for you," he glanced down, "He's definitely concerned about your safety."

"Well I can worry about my own fucking safety," I made him look at me, "I just think he's going too far, for just thinking about me."

"I don't, If I were him, it would be a Fucking miracle if I could be in the same room as you."

"Well you obviously don't know how crafty I can be," I placed my hand on his, "My brother wouldn't be able to stand in the way of what I want."

I let him process that as I turned back to Kanaya and Tavros, leaving my hand on his.

"So where was my brother last?"

"Ummm, I think he's with Dr. Greg," Tavros offered.

"Well, I'm done eating," I stood up and grabbed my plate, "I'm going to talk to him."

"Okay, have Dr. Greg check those spots on your neck," Kanaya pointed, "Make sure it's not a rash or anything."

Gamzee's laugh filled the room and I stared at Kanaya.

"What?" She asked.

"It's not a rash." I turned away as she turned red, realizing what they were.

I didn't do hickeys, but I definitely liked the little red nips that trailed my collarbone. looking at them in the mirror, I could make out three below the neckline of my shirt they were darker than the ones trailing up my neck, but still obvious compared to how pale I was.

I sighed blowing out the candle in the bathroom. Joshy's going to throw a fit about those, but I needed to figure this out.

\--------

Tavros was right, as soon as I was outside the medic tent, I could hear my brother's voice. They were talking about some antibacterial medicine. It sounded like gibberish to me, but it always did, when Joshy was talking about school.

I slid back the tent flap, "Joshy?"

"Hey, Vris." Joshy replied, "I was gonna find you after I wrapped up with Dr. Greg."

"Okay, do you want me to wait elsewhere, or?"

"No, we just finished. Thank you," He said to Dr. Greg, he stood up and I followed him out of the tent.

We walked for a minute, passing the tents and stopping at the back wall.

"What did you want to talk about?" Joshy asked.

"You first," I crossed my arms, the sun was setting and I was getting chilly in my t-shirt and shorts.

"I'm not staying here, I know you like it and you've made friends, but this isn't for me. I need to get somewhere I can be of help and somewhere I can expand my knowledge." He held up his hand to stop anything I was about to say, "But I want you to stay here. This is a good place, they'll provide for you, you can have a life here."

"What the hell are you talking about? We're family, all that's left of it I might add. Why do you want to leave me behind?"

"These are good people, Vriska. And apparently you've become attached to them," he said glancing at my neck. "It's not going to be forever and I can send you messages."

"Yea, write one up and put it in the mailbox, I'm sure the mailman will come for it eventually."

"You know there's other ways to send messages, don't make this difficult, Vriska."

"You're the one making things difficult, you're my brother, my blood. Now that I know you're alive, how am I supposed to live without knowing if today will be your last. How can you leave me?"

"It's not for forever."

"But it could be."

"Stop being so pessimistic."

"Stop being so optimistic."

"Vriska."

"What?"

"This isn't an easy decision, but I've made up my mind."

"Without me." I couldn't help but feel my emotions crash through me, I could try for a million years, but this would still break my heart. My brother didn't want me with him, he may think it's for my own good, but it hurt nonetheless. Tears threatened to fall from my eyes, but I held them back. "When do you leave?"

"Two days." His voice was low, so little time? After a year and all I had was two days with my brother before I may never see him again.

Some people would call me lucky, at least I got to say goodbye. I didn't get that with my parents, but I would with my brother. I held my head up, pushing my emotions away.

"Well, I'll be here when you come back."

"Thank you." He hugged me, and I hugged him back, we stayed like that until the sun set.

I was cold down to my bones when I finally trudged back to the attic. I took the stairs slow, trying to collect my emotions and shove them back in the figurative box I tried to lock them in. I didn't know how to face my friends, and I suddenly longed for my own room.

I stopped at the attic door, my hand on the knob. I took a deep breath and opened the door.

"Hey," Kanaya stood, "Did you talk to your brother?"

"Yea, I'm really tired, so I'm just going gonna lay down." I pushed through the curtain, falling deep into my covers, they were messy from earlier, but I didn't want to think about that now.

I heard Kanaya walk up to the curtain and stop, "Stay on your side of the room, Gamzee." She warned before pushing through the curtain.

She sat down next to me, and rubbed my back. I silently cried into my pillow. I would tell her later about my brother. She was my best friend, and I needed her support, but for now I would cry.

\--------

Eventually I had no more tears left, Kanaya went to bed shortly after, and I could hear her breath. It must be so nice to be able to sleep. I lay in my bed, reliving the conversation with my brother, trying to figure out what I was supposed to say to make him stay with me. I couldn't think of a single thing.

Eventually up gave up on that idea, moving my mind to earlier in the day. I heard a rustling in the other side of the curtain. I pushed off my bed and peeked to the other side. Tavros's form was still, even breaths told me he was asleep. On the other side of the couch, Gamzee sat up. I crept over to the side of his mistress.

"Can't sleep?" I barely whispered. He only nodded in response and pushed the covers back. I slid down next to him on the bed, my back against is chest. He slid his arm under my head, and the other around my waist.

I heard his voice in my ear, "My favorite position."

"Go to sleep." I whispered back, and he nuzzled his face into my hair. I matched my breathing to his and soon my eyelids fell shut. I would deal with his mood swing in the morning, but now I wanted to feel him next to me.chapter 5  
I woke up to the sun halfway across the sky. that pain killer really knocked me out. I was confused as to what had woken me up until Kanaya burst through the curtain.

"We've made contact with another group of people!" Her voice was coated in excitement.

"Really?!" I threw the seats to the side and grabbed a pair of shorts. The nights may be cold, but the days were still warm. I threw on a shirt and followed Kanaya down the attic stairs.

We raced across the lawn to the dining hall where the bell that woke me was being rung by a short stocky guy with cracked glasses. He held a vanilla envelope in his hand.

We were the last ones in and took a seat next to Gamzee and Tavros on the floor. I was a little hungry, but that could wait until after the announcement.

"So I'm sure word has gotten around," Equius spoke, was he sweating already? "we've made contact with a small group who is seeking temporary shelter on their way north." Clapping ensued. "They asked if I could list off some names of loved ones and friends, I know most of us are from here, but they insisted."

I tried to listen as he listed family names, but I recognized none.

"And finally, Serket."

I jumped up, I definitely hadn't misheard my own name, "That's me!"

Everyone turned their head towards me, and I shrunk in the instant lime light.

"Someone named Joshua-"

"Joshy!" I put my hand across my forehead, "He's alive."

My knees gave and I shrunk back to the flour, relief poured back through me. My brother is alive. I couldn't believe it. Kanaya was saying something next to me, but I returned my attention to Equius.

"I'll need to get back to them within the next twenty four hours, so we'll work out a plan to get them safely here." He cleared his throat, shopping off the sweat on his forehead. "Dismissed."

Everyone stood, Kanaya pulled me to my feet and dragged me out of the dining hall, Tavros and Gamzee followed. Once outside, I threw my arm around Kanaya.

"Joshy's alive," I squeezed her in my arms.

"Who's Joshy?"

I let her go, smiling, "My brother, oh I can't believe it."

My head was spinning, it felt like a dream, the one person left in my family, and he was coming here. I had to be on the team that brought them here.

"So I guess your team will be on the recon mission," Roxy sauntered over to our group. "Dirk and Dave are going to temporarily join your group, there's six of them and they're low on supplies."

I practically jumped up and down in excitement, "Joshy was in medical school, I'm so glad he's safe."

I beamed the biggest smile to my group of friends, I had a huge sense of pride that the Serket family had some resilient genes.

"Oh Vriska, I'm so happy for you," Kanaya wrapped me up in a hug. Tavros joined and Gamzee parted my shoulder.

"We're all very happy for you," Tavros added.

"Alright, I get it," I pushed them off me, "I'm getting claustrophobic."

I tried to calm myself down, but the smile wouldn't leave my face. I looked at my group of friends, there was something sad about their smiles, and my smile dimmed.

"What?" I asked.

"Well," Kanaya started, "They're heading north, so, I guess, we assumed you'd be going with them."

"Oh," my smile was completely gone now and my eyebrows drew together. "Wow, I hadn't thought of that." I looked at the group I just thought of as my friends. "I need some time alone. Let me know when we hear back from Equius."

I turned and jogged off. Straight to the med tent. Maybe Dr. Greg could help me clear my thoughts.

\--------

After I explained to Dr. Greg my dilemma, he just nodded in silence.

"Well?"

"I see your point, Vriska, but it's really a decision you're going to have to figure out on your own. I can't tell you how to live your life."

I let out an exasperated sigh. "Aren't you supposed to be super smart? You're the oldest person here, I need your wisdom."

"Sorry, Vriska, but this is a completely different environment than the one I lived in. We're all still just figuring this out."

"I know," I let out another sigh.

I heard to bell ringing, Equius must have gotten in touch with my brother's group. I raced out of the tent, giving Dr. Greg a quick goodbye.

I was the last one in the dining hall, and apparently everyone was waiting on me. I found my team and squeezed in next to them. Giving the best smile I could muster, I wrapped my hand in Kanaya's, trying to calm my heart.

"As you may have guessed, I was able to get in contact with the group traveling toward us." I sat up straight in anticipation. "They're camped out in a warehouse just outside of town. They've reported little, to almost no zombies. The group assigned to the recon mission are as follows," He paused to wipe the sweat from his forehead, "Dirk, Dave, Tavros, Gamzee, Kanaya, and Vriska. Report to the radio tent when you're ready to head out."

Today? I was shocked with how quickly we were moving out, it wouldn't be dark for a while, but did we really have time?

I followed my team back to our room, it was way too quiet as we changed and grabbed our supply bags.

Halfway to the radio tent, I stopped, "I want to be with my brother," Kanaya stopped and turned toward me.

"We know."

"But," I started, "I want to convince him to stay here."

Kanaya blinked, she wasn't expecting this. Neither was Tavros or Gamzee. I looked at each of them respectively before speaking again.

"I want to stay with you guys," I held up my hand to stop Kanaya from hugging me, "But if he refuses to stay, I'm going with him."

Kanaya looked down at her feet, took a deep breath and looked up smiling at me. "I can accept that."

\--------

Our mission was easy, Dirk and Dave would lead our group to the warehouse, since they grew up near there, we would find the group and stay the night. That would give my brother and his group the night to rehydrate, eat, and get a good night's sleep before following us back here.

We set out immediately, Jake and Roxy shot down the few walkers in the area surrounding the wall, clearing our path.

We wetter allowed to carry hand guns and ammo, but were told only to use them in an absolute emergency. Each of us were given two close combat weapons, I carried a metal bat and a crow bar stashed in my bag. We were loaded up with enough water and food to feed a small army.

Half way there, my smile came back. There were no zombies anywhere. I hoped our luck would last.

It was approximately five o'clock when we reached the warehouse. An older gentleman in army green was standing outside. A shotgun rested comfortably in his arms.

He nodded toward us, "Save the introductions until we're inside. I don't need to hear it twice."

He led us through a door on the side of the building and I instantly searched for my brother.

"Vriska!" I heard his voice come from the other end of the warehouse, I dumped my bag on Tavros after dropping the bat and took off.

"Vriska wait for us," Kanaya called and I heard my team follow, but I was sprinting.

Reaching a group of people setting much their tents, I scanned them for my brother, he stood up from taping a woman's wrist in a bandage. He stepped around her and held his arms open to me. I threw myself into his embrace and the water works started.

"Oh Vriska, I can't believe it. I thought I would never see you again."

"I'm so sorry Joshy, mom and dad-"

"I know Vris, you don't have to tell me, I'm just glad you're okay." He pushed me back so he could take a good look at me. A quick scan and my shirt was pulled up to show my stomach. "Oh Vriska, this looks terrible. It's healing nicely, but I can't imagine what you've been through."

"Thanks, bro. That's a real confidence boost." I chuckled, he pulled me back into a hug and we just stood there for a minute.

"Joshy."

"Yes?"

"I want you too meet my friends," I pulled out of his arms and gestured toward my team. Pointing to each respectively, "Kanaya, Tavros, and Gam-"

"Vriska." I heard am all to commissary voice call me. My heart stopped.

I looked around my brother and locked onto a familiar pair of blue eyes.

"Nick," I gasped.

"Hey, babe."

\--------

Apparently, I blacked out, because when the world came rushing back when I was pulled into an embrace. It was very familiar, but it didn't belong to my brother.

"Who's he?" I heard Kanaya ask. I don't know who she asked because I was frozen in place, my arms pinned to my side.

"Her boyfriend," my brother answered.

"Oh, Vriska, I missed this."

My voice wasn't cooperating, because all I managed was a small squeak.

He let me go, smiling softly, "You're so cute when you're shocked."

All I could do was look up at him, my jaw hanging open.

His face darkened as he took all of me in, "What the hell happened to your face? Holy Shit, what the hell happened to your body?"

"She was burned, jackass," Joshy put his hand on my shoulder.

"By what?" I couldn't help but notice the slight look of disgust.

"By acid, prick." My voice finally worked again, and it was very hoarse.

"Oh come on, baby," He smiled at me, "I remember how pretty you were, you know the scars won't bother me."

In my desire to return to my life before the apocalypse, I had completely forgot what a colossal douche bag Nick really was.

I rolled my eyes, unknowingly falling back into the pattern of every single one of our fights.

"You're such an ass, it's great do see a cockroach survive the apocalypse."

The smile dropped from his face, "And I see the apocalypse didn't make you less of a bitch."

I heard my brother start to herd my team in the opposite direction, "This is gonna take a while, let's get some water passed out."

They were strangely quiet, and I risked a glance over my shoulder, if looks could kill. I pointed my head in my brother's direction, encouraging them to follow. It took a second, but they complied, Tavros dragging Gamzee away. I remembered last night, when he called me beautiful. I wondered if he would still think that after seeing this.

"Are those your friends?" His tone was condescending.

I only glared back at him, daring him to say something about them so I had a good reason to kick his ass.

"I didn't know you could have friends."

"If you can get people to tolerate your presence, I can have friends."

"That's surprising, considering."

"Considering what?" I snapped.

He shrugged, "Considering your only talents are mixing drinks and warming my bed."

I lunged for Nick, popping him once in the nose, and another in the eye. There was no way I was going to let him disrespect me that much. The apocalypse changed us both.

"Fucking bitch," I watched him smear the blood dripping from his nose. Some girl was holding his arm trying to wipe the remaining blood off his face, glaring at me.

"I'm fine, let me go." I pushed away from the guy holding me back, and brushed off my hands, my knuckles were red, and I got the satisfaction of seeing I split to skin on one. His face was going to swell to the size of a baseball.

"Go cool off," Army guy pushed me in the opposite direction of Nick.

"Yea, yea."

\--------

I sat near the warehouse door, 'Keeping Watch'. I thought of it as glorified time out.

"Water, and food."

I didn't jump, I swear. Dave stood next to me, holding out a water bottle and a sandwich. drinking the water, I set the sandwich on my lap.

"You could do better."

"Thanks Dr. Phil."

All I felt like doing was wallowing in self loathing. Nick was ridiculous, I couldn't believe I loved him for so long. If the apocalypse hadn't happened, I would still be with him.

Dave, who sipped his water next to me, slid down into a crouch.

"What do you think you would be doing right now, if everything was normal?"

"Probably making sick comics."

"Seriously?"

"That, or John found this wicked game."

"Lame."

"Jealous," he laughed.

"Let me tell you, I am not jealous of your boring life," we shared a quick smile, or in his case, the corner of his mouth twitched upward.

"You should eat that. I'll watch the door. Kanaya's worried about you."

"Thanks."

"For?"

"Just accept my thanks."

"You're welcome."

I made my way through the tents, looking for either my brother or Kanaya.

"What did you even see in her?" Apparently I was forever dated to run into the lady person I wanted to see.

Nick, who was looking quite comfortable, with his head propped up on the lap of chick who glared at me earlier, and an ice pack, which she was holding, resting on his eye.

"Apparently I was great in bed." I looked down at them, hands on my hips.

"He's done with you now." Gods she was annoying.

"I thought that was apparent, considering," I gestured to the ice pack, which she was crushing against Nick's face.

"Oh My Goodness, baby, I'm so sorry!"

"I know there's no a great selection out here, but seriously, you couldn't do better?" I shook my head, walking away, "Good luck."

Luckily, my friends weren't far off. Gamzee, Tavros, Kanaya, and Joshy sat in a circle. Kanaya was giggling at something my brother said, probably at my expense.

"My ears are burning, Joshy, are you sharing something you shouldn't be?"

"Just that one time you were trying to impress my friends and broke your ankle trying to land a jump."

"Yeah, and how you ran crying to mom with snot running down your face."

"You little!" Joshy grabbed my knees pulling me onto his lap. He grabbed my sides, tickling me.

"Joshy, stop!" I laughed. "Joshy! Joshua!"

"Alright," he said when I elbowed his arm, "I'm done!"

He pushed me off his lap, and I took a breath before filling in the space between Joshy and Gamzee.

"Hi guys," I smiled brightly, tilting my head on my brother's shoulder.

"Feeling better?" Kanaya smiled back at me.

"My knuckles are," I said, cracking them for emphasis.

"I bet, they did some damage," Tavros circled his face.

"Good," Gamzee added.

"Oh agree!" I nudged Gamzee with my knee.

"Please don't encourage her," Kanaya and Joshy spoke at the same time.

"Could you guys be more alike, no wonder I like so much, Kanaya."

"By the way, Vriska has mentioned you were in med school," Kanaya glanced at me, then st my brother.

"Yes, I wanted to be a doctor because of Vriska's bike accident, the doctor that took care of her was so great, and that's why I wanted to be just like him."

"Yeah, this little honor student knows everything now, or so he says," I added.

"Oh Vriska, you're just jealous because you haven't found your calling yet," he flipped my braid in my face.

"But I have, I can kill zombies, and I'm good at it.

"Except when you get risky," Kanaya shook her head.

"My job is risky, but it has a great health plan," I winked at her.

"Not when the patient refuses treatment," we suck our tongues out at each other.

"That sounds accurate."

"What? I've changed," I flexed my arm, "I've got muscles now."

"A little too much," Joshy let out a tired sigh.

"Maybe you should go to bed, you'll be meeting a lot of people tomorrow," I leaned into my brother, and rubbed his back.

"It's do hard to get any sleep around here," He yawned.

"I know, just get some while you can," I watched him yawn again.

"Alright," he gestured to my team, "Watch her for me."

"I'm not a child."

"And yet you act like one." He crawled into a blue tent and plop down. He was asleep in seconds.

"How did he do that?"

"Your brother's a great guy," Kanaya moved herself closer to me.

"I know, the world deserves people like him."

"I know someone the world could do without," Gamzee smirked.

"Right? Gods I have a good list going."

"You guys shouldn't be allowed to agree on anything," Kanaya shook her head.

"But then you'd have nothing to worry about," I laughed.

"If only I could be so lucky."

"I can't wait until tomorrow," Tavros said, he seemed pretty excited.

"In crossing my fingers for a return trip the same as our walk here."

"I'm feeling pretty lucky, this isn't a big town." Kanaya rolled her neck, "There shouldn't be many zombies left in the area."

"Then maybe we can expand, get more land for farming and build more shelters." I nodded at my own good idea.

"We?" Gamzee pointed out.

"Why not, I just have to convince my brother. that shouldn't be hard. We're all that's left."

"Well, I think we're family now," Kanaya out her hand over mine.

"You're definitely the mom."

"Oh shut up."

"Let's grab some sleep, early day tomorrow," I suggested.

"Sounds good," Tavros agreed, but he was already on his back, using his bag as a pillow.

I followed his lead and rolled my jacket up and placed it behind my head, the ground was cool, but there was enough warmth in the warehouse that it felt nice.

The remaining lights dimmed in the warehouse, it looked like it was candle lit. rolling to my side I examined Gamzee's outline, wondering if Gamzee was the better that Dave was talking about.

I pointed his back, "Are you asleep?" I whispered.

"No," he whispered back, rolling over to face me. He was just inches from me, I was once again reminded of last night in the tower. I lied being close to him.

"I regret that you saw my argument with Nick," I kept my voice hushed.

"I regret not punching him," Gamzee reached for my hand, and I let him intertwine his fingers in mine.

"I don't."

"I'm glad someone did."

I let warmth from his hand warm me up, I felt good. Happy. Eventually I started to drift off to sleep. Gamzee pulled me toward him and I feel asleep in the warmth of his arms.

\--------

"Wake up," I heard Kanaya's voice in my dream, "Vriska, wake up."

"Hush," I scolded, "Five more minutes."

I was so warm, it felt Like I was curled up in my favorite comforter. I snuggled closer to the warmth, and felt it breathing.

"Are they awake?" I heard Tavros ask.

"Vriska is, she's just being stubborn." My brother answered. Right! My brother, I rolled out of Gamzee's embrace.

"Good morning, Joshy," I smiled up at his him and he held his hand out for me.

Gamzee mumbled next to me, as my brother pulled me up.

"Does he always wake up attacking people, or is that just me?" I stepped behind my brother.

"You just have to wake him up slowly," Kanaya answered, her hair was sticking up in the back and matted to the side of her face.

"Nice bed head," I laughed.

"Gamzee, it's Tavros," he mugged him with his foot.

"Go away," was the reply.

"That is our cue to walk away," Tavros backed up.

The rest of us followed, I pulled my brother with me.

"Why do we have to back up?"

"He doesn't do well with a rude awakening," I offered, "I learned that the hard way." My shoulder didn't hurt any more, but I still remember the pain.

"He'll wake up on his own now, and we'll be better off packing up our stuff," Kanaya said gesturing to our bags.

Joshy already had his on his back, it looked military issued and very bulky, a sleeping bag was strapped to the side and I'm sure his tent was in the bag. He was holding a half empty water bottle, and a crow bar. I looked around to warehouse, everyone was almost ready to go, I guess they were waiting on their guide's.

Dirk and Dave stood near the door, which was open. I quickly gathered my stuff, pushing some of Gamzee's things in his bag as he gradually woke up.

"What does he have?" Joshy asked me, his voice low.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, no one is that careful waking someone up."

I thought about it for a second, when I had slapped Gamzee, his eyes seemed to change, like he was waking up for a second time. He was very confused, but he apologized, so he had to be aware of what was happening.

"I don't know, I never thought to ask."

"I think it's borderline personality disorder, since when he's awake, I don't see any outstanding signs, except he seems wary and careful, but when you were arguing with Nick, Tavros had a mini freak out. Especially when we pulled him away, he was being very careful. I think heightened emotions may be a switch, he pushed Tavros away from him. and once he calmed, he didn't seem to completely recognize his surroundings."

I stared at him, it sounded pretty accurate, but I wasn't really around Gamzee when he was angry, besides yesterday, he always seemed laid back.

"It looks like he's been coping with it for a while now, with how smooth he transitions." Joshy had what I called, his doctor face.

I watched Gamzee look around for a second, registering everything around him. We locked eyes and he smiled. I returned the smile a little slowly and his brow twitched.

"We're heading home, do you want some water?" I asked him.

He nodded and zipped his bag shut. Joshy started to say something, but I gripped his arm, he stopped. I didn't want him to start diagnosing Gamzee, especially in a warehouse with people we just met. Gamzee eyed us.

"How far is your base?" He asked instead.

"Just a couple of miles," Gamzee answered, glancing at my hand on my brother's arm, "Why?"

"One of ours has a sprained ankle, I don't think he can walk all day, but a couple of miles won't hurt too much. Do you have medical supplies?"

"Dr. Greg has a pretty good set up."

"Good, he'll need a cot, I have some pain killers and wraps for him now, but he may need something stronger once we get there."

"Dr. Greg is really nice," I told my brother, "He and Kanaya treated my burns."

"Then I owe him." He ruffled my hair, messing my my braid.

"Seriously, Joshy," I undid my braid, letting my hair fall, it was almost as long as my hips. "It takes forever to braid my hair."

"Wow, it's so long, Vris, you need a haircut."

"So do you," I pointed to his shaggy mop.

"Right," Joshy used to wear his hair shaved on the sides, with just a little left on top, his hair was so unruly, if it wasn't short he couldn't do anything with it.

We joined everyone waiting for us by the door.

"All set?" Dirk asked.

Our group of twelve nodded.

Dirk and Dave took the lead, we each formed groups of two or three. Kanaya took my brother and they started chatting about the medical supplies they had, and I took up the rear with Gamzee and Tavros.

I looked ahead where Nick and that girl, someone called her Amber earlier, were walking. He had his arm wrapped around her shoulder. I sorted.

"He seems like such an ass hole." Tavros followed my gaze.

"It only took the zombie apocalypse for me to see it," I kept my tone light, "It was hard when I thought he was dead, but I guess it would have been easier. Life doesn't make things easy."

"Your brother doesn't seem to like him," Gamzee stated.

"He never did, I should listen to him more."

"I'm gland you found found your brother."

"Thanks, Tavvy." I felt more at peace with my brother around, he was generally my voice of reason.

After a couple hours, the houses around us started looking familiar, I jogged up toward my brother, who was now helping Andrew, the guy with a sprained ankle.

"We're almost there," I told him, "I can't wait for you to see it, it's a great space."

"I'll feel pretty good one we can relax," his breath was a little uneven from holding up Andrew, but he looked determined.

"We've got a few walkers up ahead," Dave have me a pointed glance.

"I'm in," I pulled the baseball bat from my bag, and handed my gun to my brother, "This'll be quick," I winked.

"Be careful, Vris."

"Always," I jogged up to Dave and Dirk, Gamzee and Tavros joined us at the front.

I glanced back at Kanaya, she fell back to the rear with army guy, Don, they both had their guns drawn, everyone else carried either crowbars or hunting knives.

"Ready?" Tavros asked me.

"I'm ready for anything," I smiled at him.

Gamzee elbowed me, "You look way to happy for someone about to kill zombies."

"What can I say, I've got some pent up stress to work out," I shrugged and they both smiled.

Dirk and Dave sprinted forward, taking down two zombies, now it was eight against five. I ran up the front of a car and smashed a walkers head with a golf swing. It fell to the ground and I slid off the car, there were three left, and one of them was in my path.

I stared toward it, it sensed me walking in my direction. I drew my bat up waiting for it to get closer.

A shot was fired and I felt it wiz past my head, my ear popped because of how close it was and watched the zombie drop, I turned around glaring at the group behind me, everyone looked confused. I looked past them through the houses and saw someone waving from one of the towers. Jake.

"I swear I'm gonna kick his ass," I stuck my pinky in my ear, trying to clear the ringing.

"Vriska," my brother called, "Are you ok?

"Yeah," I called back, "As soon as my ear stops ringing."

"That was a nice shot," Dave strolled up next to me, his sword covered in blood.

"That nice shot is going to get his ass kicked."

"Don't," Dirk came up behind his younger brother, with a matching sword, but a splatter of blood across his shirt. Behind his pointed glasses, I could see his glare, "You'd lose."

I rolled my eyes, we joined the rest of the group and finished our walk, zombie free.

As soon as we were inside the gate, I watched everyone spread out, I strode right up to Jake's tower and kicked the base.

"Hey! Next time you make a shot like that give my head some more room," I shouted up at him.

His head peaked over the side, "Couldn't help it, it was a nice shot."

I gave him the finger, take that shot.

He only laughed.

"So hostile," Nick said behind me.

I turned to face him, "Go fuck yourself."

"Point proven," He smirked, wincing when it hurt his eye.

I snorted, "I think my point was to stay away from me." I pushed past him.

His hand wrapped around my wrist, "Can we talk?"

I pulled my hand away, "I have nothing to say to you."

"Vriska," Kanaya called.

"I have more important things to do." I jogged off and joined Kanaya.

"What did he want?"

"Don't know, don't care."

"Oh, anyway, I asked your brother if he wanted to stay with us in the attic, he agreed, do if you want to show him the way after he finishes up with Dr. Greg, I'm sure he'd want a tour."

"Of course, I'll meet you guys there then."

"Okay, see you later." Kanaya waved and took off toward the dining hall.

I joined my brother in the medics tent, he was re wrapping Andrew's ankle. Dr. Greg say at his small table taking inventory. He glanced up at me.

"Ah, my favorite patient," Dr. Greg waved me over, "How's your shoulder?"

"Great," I smiled.

"Your mood has seemed to improve as well."

"How could it not, my brother's here." I posted Joshy on the back. He had finished with the wrap and turned toward us.

"I wanted to thank you for taking care of Vriska," he said to Dr. Greg, " I know she's a bit of trouble."

"We're just glad to have her. She may be in here often, but she's a great addition to our family." He gave Joshy a pointed look.

"I've always been proud of my little sis!" He wrapped his arm around my shoulder and pulling me into a hug.

"Oh, stop it," I pushed away, "you're embarrassing me."

He just laughed, it was so nice to hear it.

"So, would you like to see the place?"

"That would be great," He turned to Dr. Greg, "Thank you."

"You're welcome." Dr. Greg waved at us as we left.

Outside the tent, the group Joshy came with were seeing up their tents. I started by pointing out the gardens and the chicken coup.

"The last house is the dining hall, that's also where Dr. Greg's room is, and I think most of it is storage, water, canned goods, maps, and such," I gestured to the two remaining houses, "These two are residential, Dave, John, Rose, Jade, Dirk and Jake stay in there, it has more bedrooms, and also holds more weapons." We walked up to the house my attic was in, "And this one is my home, Roxy, Jane, Gamzee, Tavros, Kanaya, and I stay here. It only has two bedrooms, but the attic space is great."

"And that's where you and Kanaya sleep?"

"And Tavros and Gamzee," I added.

"You're joking."

"No, we hung a curtain up so it's like having two rooms."

He knit his eyebrows together.

"So killing zombies is fine, but not sharing a room with two guys?"

"I didn't say that," He said.

"But you thought it." I started up the stairs. This was going to be fun. I could already hear the lecture.

"When do we eat?"

"As soon as we get to the attic, someone usually brings enough food for all of us, I think Kanaya did this time."

I opened the attic door, instantly feeling the tension instantly.

"Took you long enough," Nick said, he looked quite comfortable on the couch.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" I pulled my brother out of the way and held open the door, "Get out."

"But, babe-"

"Don't call me that," I interrupted, "Leave."

"Fine, but you'll come around." He got up and walked past me, through the door. I slammed it shut.

"Prick."

Gamzee and Tavros sat on Gamzee's bed, eating sandwiches, and I saw Kanaya's outline on the other side of the curtain, she was changing.

"Yea, the curtain really gives you the sense of privacy," Josh, said pointing to Kanaya's outline.

"Don't start with me." I glared at him and he held his hands up in surrender. "Eat something, I have to put shorts on."

The jeans I had on were really uncomfortable, they kept rubbing against my burns.

"Go to the bathroom and change then," Josh looked at Kanaya's outline.

"Just look away," Gods he was pushing my buttons.

"Vriska," He warned.

"You can't tell me what to do."

"Fine, I give."

\--------

"Hey you," I greeted Kanaya on the other side of the curtain.

"Hey, Vris," Kanaya brushed her hair, it fell right into place, I should just shave my head.

I pulled off my pants, throwing them in the corner. I sniffed my shirt, gross. so I took it off to and threw it with the jeans. I heard a thump from the other side of the curtain.

"What?" I heard Gamzee say, followed by another thump. "Fine, I won't look."

Kanaya and I shared a look before busting out laughing.

"Just get dressed!" Joshy scolded us.

I pulled on my sleep shirt and my favorite pair of shorts, Kanaya gave them to me because she said her legs were too long to wear them. They were spandex, and my shirt slid over them. I always got a kick out of pushing my brother's buttons.

"Alright," I said pushing the curtain aside, "let's eat, I'm starving."

Instead of complaining about my shorts, my brother stared at my thigh.

"It goes all the way up," I sighed. Joshy looked so sad.

"I'm just glad you're still here."

"Gods this is depressing."

\--------

We ate, talking lightly about the area. Joshy was particularly interested in the hospital's and pharmacies in the area.

"So, Gamzee, are you supposed to be taking any medication?"

The room tensed, while I choked on my water.

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?"

"Josh," I warned.

"My sister's staying in a room with you, I want to make sure your personality disorder is under wraps."

Gamzee stood up, "That's none of your Fucking business."

"Joshua, really?" I watched Gamzee walk out, pushing his hair out of his face.

I stood up, "You needed to learn to keep your mouth shut." I glared at Josh and ran out the door. I took the steps as quickly as I could and caught a glimpse of Gamzee's back as he walked out the front door.

"Gamzee," I called after him, rushing out the front door. He turned, standing in the middle of the lawn. "Gamzee, I'm sorry about my brother."

I stood in front of him, looking up through his hair.

"I do have it though," Gamzee gave me a sad smile.

"I don't care," I shook my head, and took his hand.

"He's right, I've already hurt you."

"And I slapped you for it." I moved closer forcing him to look at me.

"I just," he started.

"Just?"

"I don't want to hurt anyone." I saw the pain in his eyes, "I don't want to hurt you."

"I won't let you," I squeezed his hand. "Well, most of the time."

He smirked, catching my innuendo.

"How cute," Gamzee's smirk faded and we both turned to Nick. He stood about three feet from us.

"Go away," Gamzee growled.

"Make me, ass hole."

Gamzee closed the distance, dropping my hand and grabbing the front of Nick's shirt.

"Listen here, you stupid mother fucker, if you you don't leave her the fuck alone, I Will End You."

I stood there in shock, I couldn't see Gamzee's face, but the look on Nick's was pure terror.

"Fuck man, alright, alright." He threw his hands in front of his face. "I'll go."

"Good," Gamzee pushed Nick back, he stumbled before he caught himself, taking a quick glance in my direction then he walked away.

"Sorry," He looked at me, "That wasn't my place."

"Thank you," They were the only words I could think of.

"Gamzee?" Tavros stood in the door way of the house, "Everything o-okay?"

"Yes, everything's great." He smiled at me. My heart fluttered, and I smiled back.

\--------

My brother left after we returned to the attic, he wasn't going to apologize, because he wasn't sorry. Gamzee sat next to me on the couch, I rested my head on his shoulder. Kanaya and Tavros had gone to the dining hall. Decided to help with dinner because of the six extra mouths.

"I could use a nap," I said in between yawns. Gamzee had pulled out my braid and was brushing his fingers through my hair.

"It has been a long day," he gestured toward the window, the sun was still high in the sky. "I can wake you up before dinner."

I pulled his arm around me and pushed myself closer to him. He rested his head on the top of mine. "I think this is better."

"At least you're comfortable."

"Are you not?" I sat up straight.

"Well, I could think of a more comfortable spot."

"Can you now," I raised an eyebrow at him.

"A few come to mind, actually."

"Oh really," I liked where this was going, "Want to elaborate?"

"Well, my favorite is spooning, and I don't know about you, but I like to be the big soon."

"Oh shut up you ass," I pushed his shoulder.

"Am I?"

"Yes, you and your hair too."

"My hair?"

"Yes." I pushed his hair out it off his face with both hands and held it there. "It's always in your face."

I studied his face, starting with his eyes, they were dark, like his hair, black lashes framing them. His nose was thin, curved slightly from an old break, he had high cheekbones, but they were soft, which contrasted against the sharp line of his jaw. I ended with his lips, they were thin, but full, he ran his tongue over his bottom lip.

I took a breath when he pulled me closer, my heart pounding in my chest. As soon as his lips touched mine, I thought my heart was going to explode. They were soft, I could taste the sweet faygo on his lips.

He was cautious at first, but the pace quickened. He pushed me down, so I was laying on my back, my hands moved from his hair to his stomach, pushing under his shirt. He held his weight off of me, one hand on the arm rest above our heads, the other by my side.

We broke free when I pushed his shirt over his head, but before his shirt touched the floor, his lips were back on mine. I slid my hands to his back, pulling him toward me. I bit his lower lip, as his hand slid down my thigh, pulling my knee up to wrap around his hips.

The warmth from his body fed the flames of our kiss, and I felt his hand grip the arm rest tighter. Taking my nails I dug them into his shoulders, he moaned into my mouth. I pulled them down his back and I could feel his excitement grow against my thigh.

He pulled away from the kiss, with a devilish grin on his face.

"What?" My voice was laced with lust, and his smile widened, revealing his pointed canines.

"We're moving."

Before I could ask where, he lifted me off the couch, pulling my other leg around him and carrying me toward the curtain, he kissed me as he pushed it to the side, and tossed me onto my mattress.

As a second thought, he disappeared behind the curtain. I heard the attic door lock and Gamzee reappeared, I admired him shirtless for a second taking in his toned muscles before my eyes moved lower. His pants were tight so the bulge pushed down the inside of the his pant leg.

"That doesn't look very comfortable," I brought my eyes back up, looking at him through my lashes.

"Yours for mine," he lowered himself onto the edge of the bed, wrapping his hands around my hips and pushing his thumbs into my sides.

I bit much lip, sighing with pleasure. He then slid his hands up my waist, pushing my shirt up and revealing my stomach. His hands felt weird against my scars, dulled compared to the right side, I could feel the calluses on his hands. He kissed my stomach, starting below my belly button and worked his way up. His hands cupped my breasts as he kissed my neck, rubbing his thumbs against my pointed nipples.

He pressed his hips between my legs, and I wrapped them around him. Moving his hands from my breasts, he pushed my shirt over my head, but instead of tossing it to the side, he balled it up over my hands, trapping them above me. He held it in place with one hand while the other traveled back down my torso.

"You're so beautiful," He whispered, studying my face.

He pressed his lips to mine and I opened my mouth to him. Our tongues twisted together as he pressed himself against me.

I wasn't sure if it was just my imagination, but I thought I heard footsteps on the stairs. Gamzee didn't react so I dismissed it, but then the doorknob turned. I felt Gamzee tense.

"It's locked, Tavros said from the other side of the door.

"Seriously?" Kanaya asked and I heard her try the knob. "Hello," she called, "We have dinner. If you haven't already eaten each other."

I felt Gamzee's excitement fade, "Fuck."

"You're telling me."

Gamzee pushed himself off me and walked to the door. Meanwhile I pulled my shirt back down and tried to push my hair back into a ponytail. It was a tangled mess, so a bun it is.

Gamzee opened the door.

"I was joking about eating each other, but I didn't realize how close to the truth I was."

"Just shut up and get in here."

I got up and pushed the curtain out of my way, "Great timing."

Gamzee's back was to me and I took pride in the eight red lines that ran down over his shoulder blades and stopped just below his ribs.

"Do you want to eat or not?" Kanaya lifted the plates in her hand.

I looked out the window and saw the sun, it hung just above the horizon. I had completely lost track of time. and my stomach rumbled.

"I could eat." We sat around the coffee table, which was unofficially our dinner table, since we've been eating there since for a few days now.

"H-have you seen y-your brother?" Tavros asked.

"Not since lunch, I've been here." I motioned to where Gamzee sad beside me, with his shirt back on.

Tavros turned a couple shades pink, which was always funny to see on his tan skin.

"I heard he's been asking around about some of the future plans for the place," Kanaya offered, "I heard he was bugging Jade so much about what she was planning with the expansion of her crops, she banned him from the garden." She laughed, "After she threw a tomato at him."

"I heard," Tavros started, "That Jane kicked him out of the c-chicken coup for asking about her p-plans to bring more animals in," he paused, "She told him she would make him eat cupcakes for as long as he was here if he didn't leave."

They laughed but I couldn't help but wonder what my brother was up to. He was way to smart for his own good, but he had no people skills.

Gamzee placed his hand on my thigh, "What's wrong?"

"I can't help but think he's got an agenda." I kept my voice down while Kanaya and Tavros chatted about the different cakes Jane made for holidays and birthdays.

"I'm sure he's just trying to look out for you," he glanced down, "He's definitely concerned about your safety."

"Well I can worry about my own fucking safety," I made him look at me, "I just think he's going too far, for just thinking about me."

"I don't, If I were him, it would be a Fucking miracle if I could be in the same room as you."

"Well you obviously don't know how crafty I can be," I placed my hand on his, "My brother wouldn't be able to stand in the way of what I want."

I let him process that as I turned back to Kanaya and Tavros, leaving my hand on his.

"So where was my brother last?"

"Ummm, I think he's with Dr. Greg," Tavros offered.

"Well, I'm done eating," I stood up and grabbed my plate, "I'm going to talk to him."

"Okay, have Dr. Greg check those spots on your neck," Kanaya pointed, "Make sure it's not a rash or anything."

Gamzee's laugh filled the room and I stared at Kanaya.

"What?" She asked.

"It's not a rash." I turned away as she turned red, realizing what they were.

I didn't do hickeys, but I definitely liked the little red nips that trailed my collarbone. looking at them in the mirror, I could make out three below the neckline of my shirt they were darker than the ones trailing up my neck, but still obvious compared to how pale I was.

I sighed blowing out the candle in the bathroom. Joshy's going to throw a fit about those, but I needed to figure this out.

\--------

Tavros was right, as soon as I was outside the medic tent, I could hear my brother's voice. They were talking about some antibacterial medicine. It sounded like gibberish to me, but it always did, when Joshy was talking about school.

I slid back the tent flap, "Joshy?"

"Hey, Vris." Joshy replied, "I was gonna find you after I wrapped up with Dr. Greg."

"Okay, do you want me to wait elsewhere, or?"

"No, we just finished. Thank you," He said to Dr. Greg, he stood up and I followed him out of the tent.

We walked for a minute, passing the tents and stopping at the back wall.

"What did you want to talk about?" Joshy asked.

"You first," I crossed my arms, the sun was setting and I was getting chilly in my t-shirt and shorts.

"I'm not staying here, I know you like it and you've made friends, but this isn't for me. I need to get somewhere I can be of help and somewhere I can expand my knowledge." He held up his hand to stop anything I was about to say, "But I want you to stay here. This is a good place, they'll provide for you, you can have a life here."

"What the hell are you talking about? We're family, all that's left of it I might add. Why do you want to leave me behind?"

"These are good people, Vriska. And apparently you've become attached to them," he said glancing at my neck. "It's not going to be forever and I can send you messages."

"Yea, write one up and put it in the mailbox, I'm sure the mailman will come for it eventually."

"You know there's other ways to send messages, don't make this difficult, Vriska."

"You're the one making things difficult, you're my brother, my blood. Now that I know you're alive, how am I supposed to live without knowing if today will be your last. How can you leave me?"

"It's not for forever."

"But it could be."

"Stop being so pessimistic."

"Stop being so optimistic."

"Vriska."

"What?"

"This isn't an easy decision, but I've made up my mind."

"Without me." I couldn't help but feel my emotions crash through me, I could try for a million years, but this would still break my heart. My brother didn't want me with him, he may think it's for my own good, but it hurt nonetheless. Tears threatened to fall from my eyes, but I held them back. "When do you leave?"

"Two days." His voice was low, so little time? After a year and all I had was two days with my brother before I may never see him again.

Some people would call me lucky, at least I got to say goodbye. I didn't get that with my parents, but I would with my brother. I held my head up, pushing my emotions away.

"Well, I'll be here when you come back."

"Thank you." He hugged me, and I hugged him back, we stayed like that until the sun set.

I was cold down to my bones when I finally trudged back to the attic. I took the stairs slow, trying to collect my emotions and shove them back in the figurative box I tried to lock them in. I didn't know how to face my friends, and I suddenly longed for my own room.

I stopped at the attic door, my hand on the knob. I took a deep breath and opened the door.

"Hey," Kanaya stood, "Did you talk to your brother?"

"Yea, I'm really tired, so I'm just going gonna lay down." I pushed through the curtain, falling deep into my covers, they were messy from earlier, but I didn't want to think about that now.

I heard Kanaya walk up to the curtain and stop, "Stay on your side of the room, Gamzee." She warned before pushing through the curtain.

She sat down next to me, and rubbed my back. I silently cried into my pillow. I would tell her later about my brother. She was my best friend, and I needed her support, but for now I would cry.

\--------

Eventually I had no more tears left, Kanaya went to bed shortly after, and I could hear her breath. It must be so nice to be able to sleep. I lay in my bed, reliving the conversation with my brother, trying to figure out what I was supposed to say to make him stay with me. I couldn't think of a single thing.

Eventually up gave up on that idea, moving my mind to earlier in the day. I heard a rustling in the other side of the curtain. I pushed off my bed and peeked to the other side. Tavros's form was still, even breaths told me he was asleep. On the other side of the couch, Gamzee sat up. I crept over to the side of his mistress.

"Can't sleep?" I barely whispered. He only nodded in response and pushed the covers back. I slid down next to him on the bed, my back against is chest. He slid his arm under my head, and the other around my waist.

I heard his voice in my ear, "My favorite position."

"Go to sleep." I whispered back, and he nuzzled his face into my hair. I matched my breathing to his and soon my eyelids fell shut. I would deal with his mood swing in the morning, but now I wanted to feel him next to me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was really long, I feel like I need an editor. I hate trying to mix setting with dialogue, so Sorry for the very dialogue happy chapter!

**Author's Note:**

> feel free to give me some input, I'm still figuring this whole writing thing out and I don't feel very confident in myself.


End file.
